Jordan and Chris became parents on December 19, 2022. I loved getting to know them over the course of my 7-week childbirth series and grew excited for the opportunity to attend their birth. Jordan was due near the holidays and she and Chris hired me knowing I had travel plans. They trusted they would be in excellent hands in the event of a backup doula, but as the due date drew closer and Jordan was not showing any signs of labor, she felt more and more comfortable with an induction.

Jordan wanted to wait beyond her due date but was comfortable with an induction at 41 weeks to insure her chosen people would be present: her doula, her mom, and other family members who had traveled from Africa and were scheduled to leave on the 20th. The date was put on the calendar for a Sunday night ripening on Dec. 18, and induction the next morning since she was only dilated 1 cm.

Jordan checked in for induction and her body had made some big changes since her previous appointment. Jordan was dilated 4 cm and 80% effaced, and she was already having contractions! Just like that, the plan changed from ripening overnight to a full-on induction. The plan was to begin Pitocin in about an hour or so.

 In a surprising turn of events from my end, I was at another birth.. It had been a drawn-out ripening and induction that spanned the weekend and while we were hopeful for a baby in the early morning hours, we couldn’t know exactly when. In spite of best laid plans to schedule an induction to assemble her birth team, Jordan was likely going to have a backup doula anyway. I am so grateful for steady backup support and so were Jordan and Chris. They continued with the induction plan trusting it would all work out as it was meant to. I contacted my backup doula, Liz to get her in the loop with what was going on so she would be ready to possibly get called in. All of this came together around 8:30 pm on Sunday.

Three hours later, just before midnight, Chris texted to say that Jordan was dilated 4-5 cm with contractions coming 3-5 minutes apart. The Pitocin had taken hold but Jordan continued to breathe calmly through each contraction and was coping well, so they didn’t feel it was quite time for doula support.

 Two and a half hours after that, around 2:00 am, Jordan’s water broke. She was still dilated 5 but the intensity of the contractions was ramping up. I was with my other client who was pushing, but it was looking like time to call in backup. Within 10 minutes, they reached out to Liz who was soon on her way to the hospital to support them.

Jordan’s labor took a very active turn with long and strong contractions that were hard to stay on top of. She decided to get an epidural in the hope she might get a break before it was time to push. She was exhausted. By 3:30 am, once comfortable from the epidural, an exam confirmed it was a good decision since she was still dilated 6 cm, 90% effaced, and baby was at -1. Jordan was eager for a nap and it was looking like she had time to get one.

Within the hour Jordan was dilated 7.5 cm and 100% effaced, and her baby was coming down well. I was still with my other client so it was still up in the air whether I would make it. But Liz was holding down the fort and providing excellent support. An hour later, upon feeling lots of pressure and with some bloody show, Jordan got checked and was dilated 9 cm! Her body had taken off. Some creative positioning with the bed had her upright to help her cervix melt away and bring her baby down.

Having welcomed a baby with my other client, I was able to come support Jordan and Chris in the last part of the birth. (It helped that both clients were birthing at the same hospital!) We were all very grateful for Liz’s 2+ hours of support in the meantime. I joined them just before 5:30 am.

Jordan’s nurse had been very diligent about coming in every 20 minutes to encourage position changes, and with Liz’s help she was already very close to pushing. Jordan was feeling some pain in her right hip and back, so I prepared a heating pack for some relief.

The midwife came in and did an exam and was excited to find that Jordan was completely dilated. At 6:15 am Jordan gave her first pushes to see how her baby moved. Her midwife was very pleased with her pushing, so she remained in the room and had Jordan continue. With her mom on one side, and Chris on the other, Jordan pushed with each contraction and moved her baby down so well. We saw her baby’s dark hair by 6:45 am and at 6:52 Jordan reached down and felt her baby’s head with her own hand. (I just love to see the reactions of moms when they do this. Their eyes are always wide as saucers!) Then at exactly 7:00 am Jordan pushed her big girl, Sahara Rose, out into the world! It was December 20, and ironically at right about the time the induction process was originally scheduled to begin.

There was so much love in that room! Jordan’s nurse had made a deal with Sahara that she WOULD be born ON her shift, and we all laughed to see that she did just that. Nurses are priceless, especially when they connect so well with their patients. Sahara was a gorgeous baby, and the added chunk only made her more so. She had a head full of dark hair and a sweet disposition from the start. Jordan and Chris were immediately enamored with their daughter and doted on her little parts and the wonder of how strong she was, lifting her head and grabbing fingers from the start. And as if her neck roll didn’t already give her away, her strength did, because she weighed a hefty 9 lb. 3 oz.! No on expected that, least of all Jordan. But it just goes to show that her body was made for it.

Jordan had eager family in the waiting room who came in to meet sweet Sahara Rose. She was the first grandchild on both sides, so she was obviously much anticipated. I gathered my things to leave after the initial hour. I knew after the euphoria wore off a bit, she would be hungry and tired. But the euphoria was contagious as I left the room. The blessing of two babies born so close to Christmas, ignited the anticipation I had for seeing my own family over the holidays. And I was grateful the babies had spaced themselves in such a way that I could attend at least some of Jordan’s birth.

Angelica and Dan welcomed their son, Otto James, on December 6, navigating the unknown of childbirth with love and courage. Dan texted me at 8:00 am on December 5 to share the exciting news that Angelica’s contractions began at 5:15 that morning. They were clocking at 7 minutes apart, so it was still early. The plan was to rest, hydrate, and eat as her body allowed, and to keep me posted for when things got active.

But Angelica’s labor was taking its time. Her contractions were still averaging 7 minutes apart 5 hours later. She found some relief in the bath, but with her contractions still hovering at the 5-minute mark I suggested she give the Miles Circuit a try. Then she did some stair walking and the contractions felt significantly stronger and were closer at 3 minutes apart. They decided it was time to head to the hospital and I met them there.

Angelica was dilated 6 cm, 90% effaced, and her baby was at -1 station. Not bad for a day’s work! It was almost 7:00 pm though and she was looking at a long night. Just knowing she had progressed was a boost to her energy and mindset and Angelica was ready to stay the course for an unmedicated birth.

Dan was a great encourager, saying things like, “You’re so strong,” and “you’re so tough.” Angelica returned to the shower, with contractions coming regularly every 3.5 minutes. She threw up in there and felt more pressure which we took as a very good sign! Peppermint essential oil on a washcloth in the shower helped with the nausea and Angelica inhaled it. The pressure continued to increase and by 12:50 am, Angelica was ready to get out.

Angelica was curious about her dilation and a quick check revealed she was dilated 9 cm, with an anterior lip. We knew what to do and suggested Angelica labor on her hands and knees and incorporate some lunges. Classical guitar played on the speaker and a hot pack on her back helped with the pain and her mindset, and a fan and cold washcloth helped with the hard work of labor.

Angelica moved into the right runner’s position as shivers overtook her, then she stood up do to some lunges on both sides. By 3:00 she gave toilet sitting a try in the hopes it would bring her baby down low enough to stimulate the urge to push. We suspected there might be something holding her baby up and Angelica was not afraid to try “all of the things.” She sat with her knees in and ankles out to open her pelvic outlet. And some clary sage on a cotton ball helped her uterus resume a steady contraction pattern of 3 minutes.

At 4:15 am Angelica did some practice pushes but with her baby at +1 it was best that she labor down a bit longer to conserve her energy. She lay on her side with the peanut ball between her ankles on her left side. Her contractions had spaced out to 6 minutes apart by 5:00 am so after careful thought, Angelica decided a little Pitocin might help. She wouldn’t need much. Angelica resumed pushing with gusto at 6:30 am after her doctor told her she really needed to make some descent before other options might need to be considered. Angelica was going to do it on her own terms!

At 7:00 am she had her water broken and then pushed on her hands and knees. And when her doctor returned at 7:30 to check in she could see that Angelica’s baby was much lower than before. She got dressed and they broke down the bed and even turned off the Pitocin so baby could get some more recovery time between pushes.

And Angelica brought her baby into the world with a mighty push at 8:04 am! He hardly cried but was pink from head to toe almost instantly. Daddy helped get those Apgar’s checked off by rubbing his son’s foot, keeping the hard rubbing from the nurse at bay. And at 8:19 am their son found his voice and cried out steadily, clearly robust and strong.

Those first moments were sweet and tender between Angelica and Dan and their son, Otto. Dan felt the strong squeeze of his son around his finger and even got in the hospital bed beside Angelica to hold his family. After their magic hour the stats were made official. Otto weighed 6 lb. 15 oz. and was 19.29 in. long. He was a peanut, but it just goes to show how much position can impact the birth. He was clearly doing something in there with his hands or body to make the process extend out the way it did.

I am so proud of how Angelica and Dan worked as a team. His belief in her never faltered and together they brought their son into the world in the gentle natural birth they had envisioned. It was not easy or quick by any means. And there were moments that night where time seemed to stand still and the promise of a baby at the end of it seemed hard to believe. But they stuck it out, stayed positive, and taking it one contraction at a time, and using some strategic positions recommended by their team became parents in a beautiful and empowering way.

This birth story has some backstory which is an important part of the journey. Jessica and Dan welcomed their fourth child on December 1, 2022. This was our fourth (and final) birth journey together which made it a bittersweet one for sure. Jessica’s births were a journey of self-discovery that originated with an ob practice with doctors in Newport News, then shifted to a Midwifery Center run by midwives in Norfolk. Her births were all unmedicated and showcased Jessica’s ability to stay calm through the most intense contractions. So, she was confident in her ability to birth wherever she might be, as long as she felt supported. Given her history and the fact that she would have to drive through a tunnel to get to her birthplace, Jessica felt most comfortable with a provider on her side of the water. This was a sensible consideration but was a leap of faith on Jessica’s part since they were new providers to her. They had midwives though, and that was her primary draw.

But Jessica experienced some red flags as her due date drew near. Her midwife pushed for an induction at 37 weeks that didn’t feel right to her. She went so far as to go to the hospital for monitoring and labs and still had to sign a paper leaving against her provider’s recommendation. But Jessica had always birthed past her due date, and she wasn’t eager to sign up for an early induction for a questionable reason. Then a week or two later, as Thanksgiving drew near, her midwife recommended scheduling an induction to avoid birthing near the holiday since there would be less midwives available. Jessica had chosen this ob group specifically for their midwives so to be told she might not have access to one in her labor was the last straw.

She reached out to me desperate for alternatives, feeling trapped in her 40th week of pregnancy with unsupportive providers. I mentioned homebirth and Jessica was open to considering it if she could find a midwife who would take her. Thankfully, she did and felt an immediate weight lifted and a sense of peace at their initial meeting. Jessica was at ease and ready to welcome her baby whenever she might decide to come. It didn’t take long to feel safe and protected, and unconditionally supported, which was a very strong reminder to her of the importance of assembling a team that you trust. She would have a homebirth. And just 11 days later that’s what she did!

It was just over a week past her due date when Jessica felt the familiar waves of contractions. It was around 6:30 pm when she sent the first text to me, but she had been feeling contractions soon after doing the Miles Circuit as recommended by her midwife. She was wise to have the children and dog head to her parents’ house close-by for the night, knowing she would likely be giving birth. I didn’t hear from her for nearly four hours and then a call came in from Dan telling me Jessica was breathing through strong contractions and very focused. This is significant for Jessica and meant she was in active labor, so I was out the door and got to their house by 11:30. (The drive was a long one, given the tunnel, but I was grateful to have made it!)

Her midwife was not yet there and after watching Jessica through just a couple of contractions I knew it was time to call and fill the tub. Dan was on it, and he let the midwife know it was go-time and got to work filling the tub. In the meantime, I remained with Jessica. She breathed with a sigh through her contractions, clutching the headboard of her bed, and trembling through the peaks. She looked to be in transition or very nearly there. This was moving quickly!

She tried a bathroom trip and took several contractions to get there and back. Her contractions were lasting 90 seconds and 3 minutes apart, leaving her with a very short recovery. A cold cloth on her neck and a fan nearby gave slight relief, but her sweat revealed her strong work. Her midwife arrived with her assistant by 11:50 pm, just 20 minutes after me. Jessica stood beside the bed through some contractions and immediately felt pressure down low. Her midwife got her things set up and they paid a visit upstairs to Jessica in the bedroom to greet her and check on baby.

Jessica was in labor land, looking disoriented and tired in between her contractions. Around 12:15 am she asked me, “If they don’t check you how do they know you can get in the tub?” I smiled at her innocent question and reassured her that there were other ways to know. I reminded her that if she felt stinging and burning and that would be her baby’s head. Three minutes later, Jessica felt her baby’s head there.

She made her way slowly down the stairs to the birth tub as the second birth assistant arrived, and she sank down in the water. The tub was situated beside the Christmas tree and made for a lovely backdrop for birthing a baby on December 1. While in the tub, we made sure Jessica took sips of her electrolyte drink prepared by Dan, and we kept a cold cloth and fan nearby. It was little things we did, but the significance behind it all was that we believed in her and trusted her.

Jessica lay back in the tub, eyes closed, and breathed with each contraction. She was in tune with her body and literally breathed her baby down and out. Her midwives watched in wonder, as did we, as Jessica with hardly a sound, and ever so gradually, brought her baby lower. First there was the bulging sac which had always been broken in her previous births. Her patient midwife waited until it gave way naturally, allowing Jessica’s body to ease her baby into the world and prevent a tear.

The midwife summoned Dan close, so he was poised to catch their baby. And he leaned in with complete confidence, saying all of the right things to encourage and reassure Jessica that he saw more of their baby with every breath. And then the head came, so quietly and gently. And after three minutes, another push brought the baby into Dan’s hands at 1:12 am on 12-1-22! Dan and the midwife brought the baby up into Jessica’s waiting arms and she held her to her breast.

It was a truly wondrous birth that left every person quietly in awe. And as I sat in those first minutes it occurred to me how very differently this birth might have unfolded had Jessica not taken the leap of faith and courage to switch her care providers! It was a beautiful and gentle birth by a woman who has a quiet strength about her that I have always admired.

There was no aggressive rubbing of their baby as she made subtle sounds and moved her body in a way that verified she was breathing. And she was pink from head to toe almost immediately. She transitioned in her own way with hardly any cries in the warmth and security of her mother’s arms; a far sweeter first moments in the world than those of a typical hospital-born baby. The placenta came a short while later and remained attached until it felt like the right time to cut it, yet another unique feature that is hard to come by outside of homebirth.

When Jessica felt up to it, she did the herculean task of getting out of the tub and walking back upstairs to her bedroom. Once settled, and confirmed she had NO TEARS (the first time ever!), she watched her baby’s newborn exam occur at her feet and saw as Dan did the honors of weighing her. She weighed 8 lb. 6 oz. and was 19 in. long. The name was still being debated but they would soon settle on Esme Joy. Interestingly, Esme means ‘to love’. Partnered with Joy as a middle name, it’s the perfect name for a baby born on the first day of December in the early part of advent, in which we celebrate with joy the coming of a Savior who came to the world to teach love. In true homebirth fashion, we assured Jessica had some nourishment and hydration, cleaned up any remnants of the birth, and then took our leave so she could settle in her own bed to sleep.

I can’t imagine a more perfect way for Jessica and Dan to have rounded out the births of their four children. I am so proud of Jessica for her courage in making a last-minute change in care. I am grateful for the midwife who could take her on so late. And I will forever be honored to have accompanied Jessica and Dan in all four of their births. I hope they share their story so others may know the importance of feeling safe and supported in birth, and trust the voice that speaks to their hearts is the same voice that has a right to be heard.

Katie and Philip met their sweet baby girl, Penelope Rose, on November 27, 2022, after a long labor journey. Katie had a strong preference for the midwifery model of care, and she believed in the process of birth and her body’s ability to do it, so she secured her care with homebirth midwives. Their home was ready, and they even decorated for Christmas early, just in case their baby came later in December. However, we were all pleasantly surprised when Katie felt her first labor contractions on November 26, with an estimated due date of December 5.

Katie’s initial contractions were very regular at 5-7 minutes apart around 4:30 am and by 7:30 had grown longer and stronger and even closer. It was soon clear that her baby had chosen to be born early. Katie alerted her midwives and me a couple of hours later and we all arrived shortly before 10:00 am. Her midwife assessed her and determined she might be dealing with an OP baby, so we went to work having Katie labor on her hands and knees over the CUB chair. A heating pad also eased some of the pain she felt in her back. She was curious about her progress and wondering what sort of labor journey she might expect. So her midwife did an exam the revealed it was still very early labor. Katie was dilated a fingertip and 30-40% effaced, with her baby at -1 station. It was time to rest. Her midwives left at 12:15 and I stepped out an hour later.

Katie rested at home as well as she could, and when things picked back up her midwives and I returned. Katie was struggling with nausea that had her throwing up, and her body was feeling very weary from laboring as long as she had. Her midwives made sure she tried to get some electrolytes down as well as food, but she was having a challenging time. With the strong suspicion that baby’s position was largely to do with her labor journey, her midwives discussed options. After talking through everything, Katie and Philip decided to transfer to the hospital to get some i.v. fluids and see about next steps. Katie’s midwives made the necessary phone calls and had the records all assembled for the transfer, and hugged Katie and Philip as they left. We promised to keep them in the loop along the way since they were emotionally invested as her initial providers.

Katie was patient and brave through three tries at finding a vein, but once the fluid was running, she exhaled a sigh of relief. Her body truly needed hydration and her uterus would likely respond well to it. A cervical exam showed that Katie was dilated 4 cm and 100% effaced at 8:45 pm. She had done good work at home! She was also pleased that there was an amazing midwife on call who received her and would be her provider during her birth.

Katie decided an epidural would be a good tool to help her get much needed rest for (and for Philip!) and perhaps aid in some pelvic relaxation to help baby do some rotation. She got about 7 hours of sleep overnight, with steady progress. We kept her changing positions, and she was dilated 4-5 cm at 11:30 pm, and 6 cm by 3 am. And by 7:50 am her water broke on its own and she was dilated 8 cm!

We used gravity to help by putting the bed in an upright throne position to bring baby down. It helped because by 9:25 Katie was dilated 9.5 cm with a rim on the right side. Baby was also lower at +1 station. We had helped her roll to her left side with the peanut ball between her ankles to open her pelvic outlet. And in 20 minutes she was fully dilated!

Katie began pushing at 9:55 am and she didn’t take long to figure it out. She pushed steady and strong and changed positions regularly, and at 11:44 am we could see her baby’s head and all that hair! And with progress every single push, Katie birthed her sweet girl at 12:03 pm on November 27, nearly 36 hours after her contractions began!

Philip cried at the sight of his daughter and Katie held her close as she let the enormity of what she just did settle on her heart and mind. She was all smiles in those first few minutes, so joyful to have her baby in her arms! The midwife was singing Katie’s praises and pleased to tell her there were no tears. And she even got the opportunity to wait until after the placenta was out before Philip cut the umbilical cord. After their magic hour as a family of three, the nursery nurse returned and did Penelope’s measurements. She was perfect at 7 lb. 10 oz. and 20.25 in. long. The midwife paused at bedside before leaving to congratulate Katie on such a beautiful birth and embracing her as an adopted patient. Her homebirth midwives had also been cheering her on, sending messages of love and congratulations as the updates came. It was a loving village of support for this new family.

Katie’s birth was a beautiful example of how seamlessly a homebirth transfer can work as well as how a doula can be the link to bridge the gap from home to hospital. Making a change in location and providers can be a daunting and scary task, but it wasn’t like that. Katie and Philip were met with respect and kindness and were immediately embraced by the nurses and provider on call. Katie was well cared for and had nothing but wonderful things to say about her experience. Her homebirth providers were pleased with the cooperative relationship between them and the hospital staff, with the transfer of records and information really paving the way for solid continuity of care. It was an amazing example of teamwork making the dream work and Katie and Philip still beam as they talk about their birth. And as their doula, that makes my heart sing!

Photography Credit to Carpe Diem Photography: Website & Facebook

Shelby and Ryan, repeat clients of mine, welcomed their third child in a homebirth on November 19, 2022. I met Shelby when she was pregnant with her second child, longing for a different birth experience than her first. It wasn’t a bad experience, as she said, but she wanted choices and options. Her second birth was closer to what she desired, being an unmedicated birth. However, her membranes were swept without her express permission, leaving her feeling out of control in her birth.

Shelby’s birth journeys awakened a passion within her for supporting others in birth as a doula. And over the course of her third pregnancy, almost exactly, she worked hard and became certified as a birth doula. Her eyes had been opened to all of the options available in birth and she was eager to explore them all with her third birth. She selected a homebirth midwifery practice, and she was sure to incorporate all of the details about her birth she desired – a birth photographer, delayed cord clamping, cord burning, waiting to discover the gender at the birth, and more – knowing she would have full freedom in her own birth space at home.

But God had different plans for her! Much of it would align with Shelby’s imaginings, but the location did not. Ryan was offered a wonderful job opportunity in the final month of pregnancy which had them selling and buying a house and settling in temporarily with Shelby’s grandmother until their baby was born. Shelby did a lot to prepare her birthing space in a home that wasn’t technically her own. Ultimately, she did the mental and emotional work to prepare a space for her baby in her heart. With all of the moving parts she had been forced to let go of, she could control her readiness within herself. And when the time was right, Shelby was ready.

She had bouts of contractions in the final weeks that were exciting, irritating, and confusing all at once. Those third babies have reputations for being wild cards, and Shelby’s was no different. Her uterus was experienced with two previous births, and it contracted in rehearsal for the big day. Shelby became a master at minimizing the discomfort and trusting she would know when it was time to rally the birth team.

On November 19, around 4:20 pm she texted me to say she had bloody show. I went into detail about how that wasn’t important enough to report and to wait until she had escalating contractions. Of course, being a doula now, and having given birth twice, Shelby knew this. But she replied telling me she had been crampy and felt different that day. She was intentional about giving herself some alone time to prepare for the baby and to pamper herself as well. She did yoga, took a magnesium bath, and did some meditation. She even made arrangements for the kids to be in Richmond for the weekend so she could really hunker down and focus on having a baby if it was truly time.

And it was time. An hour later, Shelby texted to say she was contracting regularly at 7 minutes apart. She had already alerted her midwife and told Ryan to drive back down from Richmond. She felt quite sure it was the real deal but was still content to lay low. Her midwife was with another birthing client, and she didn’t want to interrupt that. (How sweet and thoughtful!)

But a couple of hours later it was clearly time to come. Shelby was having to focus and couldn’t chat anymore, and her husband felt uneasy without the birth team present. She rallied the team at 9:45 pm and I was there by 10:40 pm. And with all of her birth team present and accounted for, Shelby was able to let go and have her baby. She relaxed and smiled, and at one point grabbed her sister’s hand and cried a little at the awe of it all.

Shelby was calm but excited and breathing confidently through her contractions and laboring standing up. The midwife and her team trickled in soon after me and set up their things. She had her eye on the tub that was being prepared for her in the center of the room. It was filled with air, then the water was started around 11:15 or so. The temperature needed to be right, so that would be another detail. It’s not a fast process but it was a process we thought there would be plenty of time for based on how calmly Shelby was laboring. But we were wrong.

Shelby was very in tune with what she felt, and she would tell us. She felt more bulgy pressure at 11:17 pm and by 11:25 she leaned forward into Ryan and scolded him because he leaned on her, a totally active labor sort of thing to do. I pressed on her back, which initially felt good to Shelby. But soon it didn’t. She was quickly spiraling through active labor into transition, and we didn’t quite see the active labor.

Shelby moved easily through each contraction, following her instincts about which positions felt best. She didn’t ask for any advice from anyone but rather owned her space and her birth. She told us what she needed, and we gladly obliged. She went from standing to sitting on the birth ball and there she would remain until right before she birthed.

Her contractions were very close at 2 minutes apart, and her labor behavior changed rapidly from casual talking between and breathing with eyes closed during, to very focused deep vocalizing and short bursts of comment between. I rubbed her back and shoulders between her close and strong contractions to remind her to let them go. But there was hardly time before the next one came.

At 11:31 pm Shelby said, “These feel slightly transitiony.” She expressed the need for counter pressure, and I did it. She was nauseous and requested some peppermint essential oil and her midwife and I scrambled around for some. She even told Ryan where and how he could best hold her and support her. And he was a humble and willing partner for it all. I mentioned after the fact how Shelby was her own sports commentator for her labor. “They are back-to-back! Why are they coming so close? I have no breaks,” Shelby said. And I quietly reminded her that her baby would be born soon. The tub was still too hot, however, and she so wanted to get in. Her midwife leaned in and told Shelby to let her baby come if it was time, and not to hold him in waiting for the tub.

Shelby’s transition contractions, both of them, brought her to her feet. She told us she didn’t want to be on the ball anymore. Later she would tell us how it felt like it was in the way, obstructing the birth of her son. And then she reported to us that her water broke. Like a pit crew, someone helped bring her bottoms off and she stood and breathed through her contractions and felt his head. “Fire in the crotch,” Shelby exclaimed, making it clear to the room that her baby’s head was there.

Her midwife crouched behind her, and Shelby reached down to catch her baby herself. She brought him up to her chest and said, “What the actual heck?! Did that just happen?!” Bringing laughter from the room. William Lewis was born at 11:38 pm, not even 10 minutes after Shelby’s 2 difficult contractions. She stood there and looked at her baby, then up at Ryan and they shared a moment of pure euphoria and amazement. And she was soon escorted to the couch nearby to properly snuggle her baby, birth the placenta, and begin her immediate recovery.

Shelby and Ryan had not found out the baby’s gender, so the great pronouncement was made by Ryan that they had a son! It was a sweet moment of revelation for the two of them and was an immediate perfect addition to their matched set of girl and boy. The placenta was born at short time later, and when the time was right, the separation was made with a ceremonial cord burning, using a handcrafted wooden box built by Shelby’s dad. They were still considering names so we didn’t know it yet, but they would settle on William Lewis.

The scale displayed an impressive weight of 9 lb. 6 oz. for this chunky baby with the 9-lb. neck roll to prove it. He was Shelby’s largest baby but born the fastest without any tears. What a testament that is to the power of a birthing woman’s body when she is given the freedom to follow its lead! We helped Shelby get situated upstairs in the room in which she would do her long-term recovery. And we showered her with all the compliments so deserved for a calm and intuitive birth that had about a 10-minute span of no-longer-chatty-to-transition-and-baby!

The midwives got another labor call, that’s three in one night! So, they cleaned up and gathered their things to go. I left soon after and played Shelby’s journey over and over in my head. There was a point where she felt like the rug had been yanked out from under her when the homebirth, she had already prepared a space for would move to a completely different place that wasn’t her home. But instead, she found her peace within and from her God, and welcomed her baby boy in the manner she had always imagined—on her terms, with her chosen support people present, and surrounded by nothing but birthing freedom and respect, two things she never felt before in her births.

This was a transition to mothering three babies, but it was also a transition for Shelby in her doula journey as well. She will be such a gift to the women she serves in her personal journey about options and advocacy, but also in her personal experiences with letting go and following your baby’s lead. I am so proud of her and will forever be honored to have been chosen as her doula twice.

This announcement has been posted without pictures at the family’s request.

Rachael had quite the journey to meet her third baby. Third babies are often called the wildcard, and Rachael’s baby number three fell right into that label! Her husband, Marc, was deployed and would almost definitely not be home in time for the birth. So, Rachael prepared herself to welcome this child without him by her side.

 Rachael aspired for a VBAC this time since her second baby had been born by emergency c-section over three weeks early due to fetal distress. Her first birth was a long induction, so she was hopeful for a different journey this time around.

She enrolled in my Spinning Babies® Parent Class and learned all about the daily positions and stretches she could do to encourage this baby to find the most space to position himself head down. And she even switched her care providers to a group known for their low c-section rate and high VBAC rate.

 Everything was proceeding well for a vaginal birth until at her 37-week appointment it was discovered that Rachael’s baby was in the breech position. This was a shock to everyone and required some quick thinking and extensive work on Rachael’s part. She ran down the list of suggestions I gave for encouraging her baby to go head down and she continued to seek regular chiropractic adjustments. Her doctor even attempted an ECV (external cephalic version) to flip baby from external manipulation but that did not work. He seemed resolute in his position, but Rachael did not stop there. She continued to do all she could to encourage him to flip.

 At Rachael’s 38-week appointment they did another ultrasound to confirm position since the c-section was scheduled for the following week. And wonder of wonders, Rachael’s baby boy had flipped head down! It was another surprise discovery but a much happier one. So, Rachael went about walking and lunging to keep her baby in the head down position. The following Tuesday they had an ultrasound scheduled to confirm he was still head down and would then cancel the c-section for the following day.

 But, true to wild card baby form, when they did an ultrasound the following Tuesday, in week 39, Rachael’s baby was breech AGAIN. Her provider was not comfortable doing another ECV due to the risk of rupture, and Rachael was left unsure as to what felt like the best choice. Her cervix was still closed, and they planned to do another ultrasound the next day before the scheduled c-section just to be sure. Ultimately, Rachael made peace with the safer controlled c-section rather than increasing the likelihood for an emergent situation with a repeat ECV or even delaying the c-section another few days.

 The next morning, Rachael reported to the hospital for the c-section with her sister by her side. Everyone’s eyes were trained on the screen during the ultrasound. What position would her baby be in today?? The plan for the day was soon clear because her baby was still in the breech position. He had made his decision known too it would seem! Rachael handled the situation with grace and a positive mindset, knowing she trusted her providers and wanted only the safest birth for her son. Plus, she had come to peace with everything the previous day.

 Rachael waited through the morning for her c-section. She had been bumped for a more urgent need. It was a reassuring reminder that the path she had chosen was not the urgent one. Her baby was fine and would be born when it was their turn. Not only was her baby’s position flipping and flopping, but her line in queue for the OR was also flipping and flopping. Originally, she was bumped to the afternoon from her early morning slot, and then was returned to a late morning time. 

 The wheels started turning after 10:30 that morning. Her team came in one at a time for introductions and to ask the necessary questions, and by 10:49 that morning Rachael was escorted out the door and down the hall to the OR. Her sister was summoned to her side once the spinal anesthesia was in place. And at 11:26 am on November 23, 2022, the day before Thanksgiving, Judah John Paul was born! He weighed 7 lb. 9 oz. and was 20.5 in. long. He looked like his daddy and once he was with his mommy he grabbed for her hand. Rachael was in recovery with her son within the hour and he latched for the first time at 12:53 pm, just shy of 90 minutes old.

 There was some clarity in the decision when Rachael’s doctor went in for the baby. Rachael’s incision was thin, and with an already elevated chance for rupture, she might have dodged a scary outcome. Her baby boy presented with his feet and his bottom, so he was very much in the breech position at the time of birth.

 Rachael never would have imagined choosing a scheduled c-section in light of her history and her plans for this birth. But as she gathered more information and had discussions with her providers, she felt included in the decision and her option mattered. Given all the information presented and discovered, Rachael chose the best path to meet her son. And that’s the stuff that positive birth experiences are made of! I will forever be amazed at how mobile Rachael’s son was up to the very end, and in her grace in allowing him to literally choose his birth position and path.

Oh boy! Or rather, oh girl! This birth journey was a surprising one! This was my second time serving Rachel and Bruce in birth, having welcomed their first baby in a close call (I got there right after baby did, and they had only been there a short while before that), we wanted to make extra certain everyone was assembled to usher their sweet Evangeline Marie into the world. Their first daughter was born in 2020 at a local hospital with all of the restrictions in place like masks and only one support person in addition to your doula. While their baby was in such a hurry Rachel hardly spent any time laboring in the hospital, she knew from that experience and the timing of the drive that she would like to welcome this baby into the world in her home.

We had our prental visit in their home, recently purchased, and looking pretty put together. Nothing like having a due date looming to get you nesting a new home in a rapid pace. Rachel had her bedroom set up and the main living areas. Her plan was to labor and birth in the tub in her bedroom with just her birth team, husband, and mother present. It would be a beautifully intimate experience and we were excited for it.

Rachel sent a text to me at 6:30 pm on October 29, right as I was leaving a birth at a local hospital, telling me she had been feeling contractions all day that seemed different than Braxton Hicks. They weren’t getting longer, stronger, or closer yet, but they reminded her of the contractions that began her previous labor. There was also some fluid that was leaking, so Rachel’s alarms were up. She alerted her midwife as well, who as luck would have it was also just getting home from a birth. So she and I planned to get some recovery rest in until Rachel said any different.

Just past 11:30 pm, Rachel texted that the past 4 to 5 contractions were picking up in intensity and lasting about a minute. I recommended she update me after an hour had passed unless they changed significantly before then. And 50 minutes later she texted that they contractions were coming every 3 minutes. This seemed a good time to hit the road, and I was on their doorstep by 12:50 am.

Bruce greeted me with a big grin, and I headed upstairs to Rachel. She was very calm and chatty, and I wondered if I might be there too soon. Her midwife was not yet there but had tasked us with letting her know when to come. This would be a tricky call to make but considering she had just been at a birth we wanted to let her rest if possible, too. (Our words, not hers.)

By 1:10 am I reached out to apply counter pressure to Rachel’s lower back through a contraction. She told us her back was bearing a lot of the contraction pain so I thought it might help. Bruce went down to the kitchen to brew some coffee and returned with two mugs and handed one to me as if I was visiting for coffee.

The pool was inflated, and Bruce had started filling it before I arrived but paused the filling to make sure the water was the right temperature once it was needed. He could add hot water when Rachel was closer to giving birth, for she certainly had a way to go based on her demeanor. Rachel breathed quietly through her contractions and chatted pleasantly between them. She even asked Bruce to bring up a snack basket for her to grab a bite to eat. Little dd we know she would have her baby in her arms about 45 minutes later.

The diffuser going, lights dim, and a labor playlist going, Rachel crawled onto the bed and labored on hands and knees there. As the time approached 2:00 am I heard Rachel exhale a quiet sigh through her contractions. It seemed prudent to time a few and see if it might be time to alert her midwife to head our way. After just 3-4 contractions, it was evident Rachel’s contractions were every 2 ½ to 3 minutes, and it was time to call her midwife. Her midwife had a 30-minute drive which didn’t seem a problem when we called. I also told Bruce to resume filling the tub so it would be ready when the midwife arrived. Rachel’s midwife said not to get in the tub until she arrived, and we wanted it ready to go.

Rachel wandered to the bathroom and when she wiped there was blood. She paused at the sink through a contraction before washing her hands. And she even posed with Bruce for one last belly photo. As Rachel returned to the bedroom she was hit with another contraction. She braced herself against the bed and said, “I feel it in my butt now,” and rolled her eyes with a nervous smile. It was 2:10 am. Rachel’s quiet sighs grew louder and longer, moving into moans. Rachel’s own mother sat on the bed beside her and reached out her hand to place it upon her daughter’s hand. This would be her first birth to attend outside of her own.

Rachel swayed beside the bed, and I could see her cheeks turning flush as her body heated up with labor. By 2:18 am she was visibly sweaty and told us of the pressure she felt. I put my fan beside her and angled it so it would catch her face with some wind. We also placed a wet washcloth on her neck. All the while I was texting her midwife updates, telling her “Things have taken a really active turn,” at 2:22 am. She still had about 15 minutes left before arriving, but it felt like it would still be enough time.

But two minutes later Rachel said she felt pushy, and then the next minute at 2:24 am her water broke. I tried to exude calm but at that moment I was pretty sure the midwife wouldn’t make it. I helped Rachel get her pants off, had Bruce put some chux pads on the bed, and suggested Rachel get on the bed in case she was about to deliver. I texted her midwife the update that her water had broken, and she was feeling pushy to which she recommended we put her on speaker phone.

We called the midwife and placed the phone right beside Rachel so she could hear her voice and get coached through the delivery, if needed. Her midwife said, “If you want to slow it down,” (I love that she said if you want to) go on your hands and knees with your head lower than your butt. We already had her in that position and had recommended blowing when she felt pushy to hold things off. Rachel blew the candles out and rested her head upon the bed with her bottom in the air. And she managed to wait for her midwife’s arrival.

Still on speaker phone, we heard her unload the car and instruct the birth assistant which bags to grab, and then they ran up the stairs to us. The midwife greeted Rachel and went right to business. “If you want a water birth, get on in there! Let’s do this!” and Rachel wasted no time getting herself in the warm water. She sank down onto her knees and leaned over the edge of the tub facing her husband. And with the very next contraction she pushed, and her midwife could feel the baby’s head. Another contraction came and Rachel brought her baby into the world. Rachel pushed for just 3 minutes and Evangeline Marie was born at 2:39 am just 3 minutes after her midwife set foot in the room.

Rachel and Bruce cried joyfully at the arrival of their second daughter, and grandma was teary too. The midwife called out for the necessary items, and they were handed to her by the birth assistant. Baby was covered with a towel and the midwife listened to her heart and breath sounds and nodded with a smile that all was perfect. Rachel lingered in the water with her baby and the placenta was born when Rachel was ready to release it. Once the placenta was out, the cord was clamped and cut. Bruce got some skin-to-skin time as we helped Rachel up out of the tub into bed.

The midwife and birth assistant stayed nearby watching over mom and baby to make sure they were transitioning well. And they were. It was quiet and gentle, and the environment in which Evangeline would spend her life. She snuggled with her mom in the bed and in a short while she was ready to latch for a feed. Then we stepped out into a nearby room to allow the new family some privacy before the newborn exam. Eventually we would learn that Evangeline weighed 8 lb. 2 oz. and was 21 ½ in. long. We also learned that Rachel had no tears, setting the stage for an easier healing process.

We lingered awhile and then went our separate ways to leave this sweet family to begin the road of recovery and life with two little girls. There was nowhere to go but sleep. And Rachel’s mom was ready to take care of big sister when she woke up, which would probably be in just an hour or so. It was a beautifully orchestrated family birth, all except for calling the midwife a bit late in the game. In my defense, Rachel’s transition was about 2 contractions, and her active labor was about 30 minutes. Those are some short stages in anybody’s book. All told it was perfectly timed though, for everyone arrived when Rachel needed them.

One might look at how things unfolded and think we came together too late and almost missed it. But you might also see that Rachel’s labor unfolded as her team arrived and she held off on birthing her baby until the final members of the birth team had arrived. The mind and heart have a strong pull on labor, even stronger than the body. Either way, it happened just as it was meant to. It’s amazing to look back on this birth and see how miraculously it all came together as calmly as Rachel labored for most of it. Truly.

Andrea and Matt welcomed their seventh child on October 25, 2022! This was my sixth time as their doula and after so many births together we felt confident we knew how things would unfold. Andrea would alert the troops and we would assemble, and she would birth within a short time. Well, even a woman with a well-established history of a short active labor can have a birth that is different, as Andrea’s journey would remind us all.

At our prenatal visit we discussed the importance of having a plan in place for the other children. Andrea would be giving birth at home, same as last time, but a backup plan for the kids is always wise. They had a trusted friend who could step in, but with Matt there, Andrea felt confident he could wrangle kids if needed, and her doula and midwives could be present for her.

Matt alerted the troops, so to speak, around 8:15 pm on October 24. Andrea was having regular contractions, and in less than 30 minutes from that text it was time to head over. I arrived around 9:00 pm to find Andrea breathing calmly through her contractions, but pleasantly chatty between them. She shared that she had been feeling contractions all day, Matt gave her dinner and her contractions spaced, but then resumed at a steady pace. Her midwives arrived a short time after I did, no doubt assuming the labor would be quick.

They hastily made the bed in preparation for birth and Andrea labored her way about the room. Leaned over the cub birthing chair for a while. It was a nice stable change from the birth ball. I applied counter pressure on her back through contractions, in between them there was still time to talk. Matt shared about a tender moment in which Andreawas cuddled on the couch with all three of her daughters—two were on the outside, and the third was still inside.  Matt and Andrea are well connected in labor. Matt was always nearby (as long as the kids didn’t have a pressing need). He touched her, stroked her shoulders, kissed her at the conclusion of the contraction. He was a committed partner and tried his best to be her everything.

Andrea felt most of the pain in her back, so we warmed my heating pad and pressed it there. Andrea moaned under her breath with her contractions and Matt moaned along with her. The midwives were sitting off to the side waiting, and listening, but also trying to be distracted enough so Andreadidn’t feel like a fish in a fishbowl being stared at. Every so often they would listen for a fetal heart tone, but by and large were a quiet unobtrusive presence.

By 10:00, Andrea and Matt were spooning on the bed. The contractions were mild enough for this. Pillows were placed for comfort, and Matt used his leg to help keep Andrea’s legs comfortably apart, Andrea’s request. As they lay on the bed, the contractions seemed milder, and Andrea’s mind wondered if everything was ok. Things weren’t progressing in the usual way for her. She asked to have her cervix checked, and her midwife responded calmly but with reassurance, “there are several signs you are progressing. The contractions are closer, stronger, and baby was lower at the last Doppler listen. Don’t get in your head. Each baby is different.”

Andrea tried to release that. We saw the tension between her eyebrows and reminded her to soften. And around 11:00 her sounds were more open and louder. She took a bathroom trip and labored upright on the cub. She told us she felt her baby there like she’s ready. And she kept shaking. I reminded her the shaking was part of it. Andreasought something different, so she labored on her hands and knees over the cub. There was some bloody show, another sign of changes. I reminded Andrea to focus on her deep breaths and her baby will let her know when she’s ready to come. “Almost done. Love,” Matt whispered. And she was, but not quite.

One of the kids woke up, so Matt went to fetch her. The midwives migrated out of sight to the hallway just outside the bedroom. And Matt tried to soothe their curious daughter back to sleep. But she was wide-eyed and staring at her laboring mom, and the guests who had come to usher the baby out. In time, her eyes closed, and Andrea’s contractions had spaced out enough to allow her some rest. Matt brought their night owl downstairs to help settle her and then another child wandered out of bed. So they assembled in front of the TV downstairs.

I took Matt’s post beside Andrea and lay beside her in bed. She grabbed my hands as an anchor of support as her labor moved into a more active phase. A wave of nausea overcame her, and she threw up. The midwives returned to the room and began to place chux pads around for when the baby came. Matt returned to the room right around this time too. 

Andrea’s midwife recommended she backward toilet sit and so she did. We made the light muted with votives and Matt stayed close, rubbing her back and clutching a rosary. Andrea was on the toilet a good 30 minutes and her labor pains grew so strong she hit the wall with her fist. “Ouch, ouch,” she cried, and I gently reminded her to say, “Out, out,” instead. Eyeing their large standup shower with a bench, I suggested that might be a good place to go next. Andrea and Matt entered the shower together, she draped her arms around his shoulders, and he held her up through a strong contraction. 

Two minutes later, Andrea told us she felt the baby there, I called for the midwives, who were there in the blink of an eye. And with the next contraction Andrea breathed her baby right out into her midwife’s hands. It was a lovely sight to see her give birth while in the arms of her husband. The bench was right there so she sat gently back and received her baby there. She was born calmly, crying enough, but not too much. 

In time they made their way back to the bed and did initial assessments of Andrea and birthed the placenta. It was determined that her blood loss was on the higher end of normal, so a hospital transfer was recommended. Thankfully, Baby Elizabeth was perfectly healthy so she would ride along with daddy in her car seat for easy access to mommy. Matt woke up all the siblings so they could meet baby sister and get the scoop as to why mommy was going to the hospital. She wouldn’t be there long, just long enough to get fluids and some medication to help with bleeding, and then she would be back home.

Before the EMTs transported Andrea to the hospital, the midwife did the newborn exam and got the stats. Elizabeth weighed a perfect 7 lb. 13 oz. and was 20 in. long. She was Andrea’s most challenging birth, but she stayed the course and took it one contraction at a time. It required Andrea to fight until the end, to pick herself up and keep on going. But she did it. And another beautiful Eshnaur baby was born.

These beads began as a fun craft project. They were a way to keep a count of the births of all the babies for which I was the doula. When I first began to compile them, I poured over birth notes and stories written 15, nearly 20 years ago to find gender. Information was scattered in several places in the beginning of my doula work. My record keeping became more streamlined in recent years. But I was determined to have the right number of blue and pink beads. (FYI, the early numbers were a guess since I did not note gender of the very first doula babies.) But as I dove deeper, I reacquainted myself with the stories behind every single bead. And I was humbled and overwhelmed. And the colors of the beads paled in comparison to the rainbow of hues represented in each journey.

Such a great number of these babies were born over many hours of difficult decisions that required their moms to let go and let the journey unfold. Some came in a straightforward way that was surprisingly normal, as far as birth goes. But is birth ever normal, really? Friedman’s Curve tries to put it in a box of expected duration and contraction pattern, but we all know that birth is inherently wild and unpredictable. There was the time that a baby was born in the parking lot, or the one born right outside the ER entrance, or the one most recently born in the bathroom of the hospital lobby. And there was the baby that was born in the foyer of the house before anyone got there because the shower was such an effective comfort measure, she relaxed herself into transition, and crawled out of the shower to give birth in the entryway. That was an accidental homebirth, by the way, not intended for home. Baby chose home. And I can’t forget the time, only once, where I was there at home alone with my client and realized too late it was time to leave for the hospital. (The midwife had told us to wait.) And my client’s water broke and I did what I had to do and I caught the baby. Then we called 911. It is the only time I ever caught a baby but even today remains one of the highlights of my life.

There have been tears. I’ve seen women cry tears of disappointment, defeat, fear, and sheer exhaustion. But I have also seen joyful tears of jubilation, euphoria, relief, and pure love at the sight of a child born. Fathers cry too, for all the reasons just listed and more. They shoulder a huge responsibility to keep their birth partner safe and cared for, and the baby makes that responsibility multiply in significance. It’s a lot on a person, especially the first time. And those daddy tears are moving.

I have sat outside OR doors with nervous fathers, retelling fond memories of their courtship, or confessing their fear and concern for the woman they love heading into surgery. I have picked up the pieces after a birth that didn’t go as expected, or a birth that went all wrong. I have walked through the wreckage of birth trauma and even the loss of life. The white beads in the jar are for the babies who did not survive. I remember them all by name. Those beads are the most precious of all.

I have also seen healing in birth. Many clients who experienced loss or trauma, sought my assistance to walk beside them to a new day, a birth that was healing and redeemed a previous experience that left a painful scar. Those births are like a salve. It never erases the previous experience but adds richness to it and can empower the one birthing and facilitate a solid postpartum recovery as well. Those births often bring tears to my eyes too. Those and the really long ones. They are a struggle for everyone. Being tired just makes everything more difficult.

As of today, my bead jar numbers 924 babies, but tomorrow it will contain 925 beads. I will keep counting to 1000. After that I’ll likely keep counting. I will never fill the jar. I would have to attend births for 20 more years at the busy pace I have maintained the last 10 or so. And I know I can’t do that. These beads have shown me all I have poured into my work over the years. And they have also reminded me painfully that my body can only do so much. One day I will have to stop the birth work. But not yet. Not today. I will keep going, but at a slower pace. I will continue to bear witness to the journey and stories contained within the beads of this jar, past, present, and future. You may see blue, pink, and white, but at their core, the beads are as varied as the subtle nuances of color in our technicolor world. Every birth as unique as the birther and the baby being born. And I am honored to be there for it.

Jessie and Joe are parents, after quite a journey. They had already experienced loss, so it was very clear from the start that Jessie desired a safe journey earthside for her son. And she wouldn’t feel at ease until she had her baby in her arms. She was very determined to prepare by taking my childbirth class and enlisting my support as her doula, knowing how uncertain birth journeys can be.

The pregnancy in and of itself was a journey of trying to trust information given to them and making the best decisions for their baby. An anomaly was shown on ultrasound that had attention drawn to her son’s kidney. Then there was the late term development of gestational diabetes. Ultimately, too many converging risk factors had Jessie’s providers release her care to Maternal Fetal Medicine through EVMS at Sentara Norfolk General, our local high-risk specialists. It made it even more challenging to trust that all was well with the pregnancy and her baby. But the reassurance of receiving the most specialized care for her baby did bring some peace of mind too.

As if that wasn’t enough, in the last month of her pregnancy, Jessie’s baby was measuring surprisingly large. He was projected to weigh 11 pounds or more by the time of delivery, topping ultrasound estimation at 10 pounds at 38 weeks. This was a lot to consider and had Jessie and Joe deliberating over the recommendation of the doctors to either induce or schedule a c-section.

This was not an easy decision and Jessie weighed her options extensively. We talked through the pros and cons of each, and at the heart of her decision was the strongest desire of her heart for a healthy delivery for her son. The decision was made to have a c-section. It wasn’t as simple as planning a date however, for Jessie and Joe were at the whim of a busy hospital schedule and then the crapshoot of births that would arise that very day. But with spirits hopeful and excited, we looked forward to the day.

I pulled up to the hospital parking garage to quite a sight that morning around 6:30 am. It was a projected message lit upon the building front that said, “Be Kind.” Simultaneously the song, Hands, by Jewel was playing in my car, “In the end, only kindness matters, in the end, only kindness matters.” It felt like a sign of some sort to me as I parked.

I joined Jessie and Joe in the PACU where they were standing with all of their bags. It seemed empty there, but the reason for their waiting was because the staff had been pulled into another more urgent birth. Eventually, at 7:15 am, the nurse came in and helped get Jessie settled and on the monitor. Jessie went over her list of preferences and was received with nothing but support and reassurance that all could be met. I think it helped Jessie to feel like she had a voice that was heard, not to mention some say in the decision, even with a scheduled c-section.

The nurses changed shifts, bringing in THE birth team for Jessie and Joe. The anesthesiologist came and sat bedside to explain the process of the spinal and to answer any questions Jessie had. Her doctor came in and did the same. Then the CRNA came in as well as another doctor. It took a bit of work to get Jessie’s iv set up but eventually that was completed and all that was left was to wait.  Jessie had been bumped for a more urgent need, but by 11:33 am she finally went back to the OR.

Even setting up the spinal was harder than anticipated for Jessie, so Joe’s wait to join her was longer. But finally, at 12:11 Joe was ushered to the OR to sit beside Jessie and welcome their son into the world. At the moment of birth, everyone cried, even the anesthesiologist. After experiencing loss, there was a profound relief and a sense of peace that came when they heard the voice of their newborn son cry out. And while he didn’t weigh 11 pounds, he was close to 9 lbs, at 8 lb. 13 oz. And Jessie is a small woman, so there was a little bit of validation there as well. The c-section went well, Holland was pronounced generally healthy, but needed additional breathing support in the NICU that first day. Jessie reported that he was able to latch for the first time the very next day and was off to a great start.

Jessie continues to process the experience and mourns what her birth was not able to be. The c-section, while straightforward, was traumatizing to her, and she continues to work through that. Jessie sacrificed a lot to ensure her son was born safely and is working to pick up the pieces to complete the puzzle of her story. She is being diligent about asking for help and taking care of herself so she can be the best mom she can to Holland. And Joe has been an unfailing partner the entire time. Birth can look so many ways it’s like a Choose Your Own Adventure book. But if there was ever a heroine in the story, it is Jessie. I am so proud of her strength, discernment, sacrifice, patience, and trust, and her willingness to do the hard thing for her baby. It makes for one heck of a great mother!