Elyse and Tony welcomed their second daughter, a second surprise gender, in their second homebirth on Saturday, October 14. Repeat clients are a wonderful opportunity for me to develop an even deeper relationship through multiple births. And Elyse and Tony were no different. The text of the pregnancy was the foray through which our second journey began, and I didn’t hear much from Elyse until we were coordinating our prenatal visit many months (and two seasons) later! The team would be the same – same midwife and same doula We were excited for the reunion that would occur when their newest little love entered the world.

Elyse welcomed her first baby a couple of weeks before her due date so when she approached her due date with this one she felt overdue. Thankfully, the text came through on October 14 at 7:15 am that Elyse’s water broke at 5:30 am! Her water broke at the start of her first labor so it was a conveniently obvious way to signal her baby was coming at some point that day. It was especially helpful considering they had a toddler to contend with and eventually have picked up so as not to be underfoot.

Elyse would update as things developed but she did feel crampy soon after her water broke. Three hours later by 10:30 am, she sent the text, “Ok things are getting a little spicy. Contractions are 3 mins apart.” She didn’t have to tell me anything more. I knew that meant it was time for me to head over.

When I arrived, Elyse was laboring on her hands and knees against the couch and her daughter was milling about while Tony took care of details, including getting their firstborn settled for a nap and reaching out to a friend to pick her up later. Elyse sipped on a smoothie between contractions. Then when a contraction rolled through she swayed on her hands and knees against the couch. In her unassuming way, Elyse greeted the intensifying cotractions with an, “Oh sheesh,” right before closing her eyes to focus.

Tony disappeared with big sister to try and settle her down for a nap but it wasn’t happening. Something about having a visitor with a large inflatable created enough of a distraction for her not to miss anything. Elyse went to the back to give it a try and managed success for a little while. Big sister was asleep by noon. Elyse continued to breathe through her contractions and add a heating pad to her lower back. She continued to coordinate momming details with Tony like making sure their daughter had food packed for when she was picked up by a friend. Tony had it all taken care of.

As labor intensified, Elyse moved to a back room to ease the transition when their friend came to pick up their toddler who was still asleep herself. Her midwife called to check on things around 1:00, asking questions about what Elyse was feeling during contractions Rectal pressure was one of the questions to which Elyse didn’t really feel. But 10 minutes later she did feel rectal pressure through a particularly strong contraction so she called her midwife to head on over. She was only 5 minutes away, it turns out, so she was on her doorstep momentarily.

Elyse rested in bed and reached for Tony’s hand at the start of a strong one, and by the next contraction there was a knock on the door. Tony roused their toddler who was on her way to an adventure at a friend’s house. And like clockwork Elyse’s labor kicked up a notch. The midwife arrived a couple of minutes later and the contractions became strong enough to require counter pressure on her lower back.

Elyse’s legs shook and her contractions moved from 3-4 minutes apart to 3 minutes apart and lasting 90 seconds. Elyse labored over the cub and lunged to one side through a contraction and then to the other. This is a woman who is not afraid to do physical work. Every one in a while they would lean in a listen to baby on the doppler. The heart rate was always sure and steady.

By 2:00 Elyse was exhaling more audibly through the contractions. We could tell that she was working harder. Her baby was also tracking lower in her abdomen, another good sign of labor’s progress. There was no need to check a cervix. The signs were there. As labor picked up so did the rain outside, providing a wonderful backdrop of white noise for Elyse. She continued to lunge through contractions and asked Tony to push even harder on her back.

She moved to stand up at 2:30 and continued to ask Tony to push harder. We knew Elyse was getting close. She took a trip to the bathroom and saw more evidence of cervical change. And 10 minutes later her vocalizations became louder and lower through contractions. Her midwife and the assistant moved into the room quietly. Five minutes later, Elyse had a contraction that brought on the recognizable guttural sound of pushing. Her midwife asked, “Did you feel like you were pushing?” To which Elyse responded, “Yes.” Her midwife excited but calmly said, “Cool!”

Elyse was already on the bed with Tony, so she eased onto her side and gave a push at 2:54 pm. It didn’t take long, maybe 4 contractions before her baby was born at 3:07 pm. It was a remarkable sight to see her child born because the eyes were wide open as the baby emerged to the chest and then flopped out! It wasn’t until Elyse had her baby in her arms and took a look at the undercarriage that Tony and Elyse confirmed it was another girl! After plenty of bonding and skin to skin, Revel Monroe would be weighed and measured at 7 lb. 6 oz. and 20 in. long.

There was so much vernix! Elyse dabbed it on her face like war paint. As their baby cried out, Elyse said, “It’s ok. We’re nice.” We stepped out of the room so Elyse and Tony could bond with their newest one. And after about 1 ½ hours the newborn exam ensued. Elyse also finished her smoothie, and within 2 ½ hours, big sister was home to meet her sister.  Soon after that, we served up a bowl of soup and rice with chicken for Elyse to enjoy, thanks to Tony putting it on the stove a bit earlier. We all were able to get fed that evening. Oh, the comforts of homebirth.

Revel was contentedly nursing and napping, as Tony and Elyse rested and took in their little family. We cleaned up our things and left once they were settled. All in all, it was a beautiful way to spend a rainy Saturday afternoon. And how lovely that behind their front door they welcomed a miracle. The ordinary location of an extraordinary process like giving birth elevates the home in a way like nothing else, if you ask me.

Alyson and Chris welcomed their second child, this time a son, in a very surprising birth on October 9. Since their daughter ended up coming about 2 weeks late by induction, baby’s arrival any time before the due date was not even on the radar. Alyson was very adept at ignoring the twinges and discomforts of late pregnancy that seem to come on stronger with subsequent pregnancies. She even requested a book from me to brush up on labor and I had been driving it around in the back of my car to bring to her a couple of weeks prior to the full-term 37-week mark. Worst case I could bring it to our prenatal that was scheduled around then.

The week Clifton was born, Alyson shared that she had been feeling weird all week. That Friday she thought her water had broken but a trip to the hospital and a spent nitrazine paper later, it was confirmed that it hadn’t. She was sent home. It was chocked up to typical last trimester discomforts and left at just that.

But baby Clifton had very different plans! We had scheduled our prenatal for Sunday, October 8 and as I was walking out of church Alyson called to tell me she was pretty sure her water broke, and we would not be having our prenatal visit scheduled an hour later. She was headed to the hospital instead since she was just 34w6. She didn’t expect a baby to come for another 6 weeks!

Turns out Alyson’s water did break. But she was only 1 cm dilated. She texted around noon to update that she would receive steroid injections to help baby’s lungs mature and if labor didn’t happen overnight, they would work on starting things the following afternoon. We covered some birth details via text, including Alyson’s desire to have an unmedicated birth. She labored on pitocin previously and while she hoped to avoid it, she was willing to give it a try again since she labored many hours before an epidural. Alyson would send updates in the meantime.

Sitting in a hospital room waiting for labor can be a daunting task. Alyson was permitted some meals which was a godsend, and Chris helped to keep the mood light. She had excellent staff taking care of her the whole time, easing her mind, and keeping things positive. Alyson tried to stay relaxed and “not freak out” (her words), and even thought she might watch some YouTube videos to reacquaint herself with birth. After all, she had expected to have another month or so to do all of the prepping.

As the date turned to night, Alyson requested some Benadryl to help her get much needed rest. The day had been emotionally eventful even if she wasn’t in labor yet. I went to bed, not expecting to hear about much labor that night based on the day’s lack of action. I didn’t get an update for a few hours, but in the meantime, Alyson sensed some contractions starting up at 3:30 am. She had been napping through the contractions prior to that but wasn’t able to get back to sleep after that.

Chris sent me a text around 5:15 am telling me Alyson was dilated 4 cm and 90% effaced. It was very exciting because Alyson’s body had begun the labor process on its own. We were all hopeful she could avoid pitocin. Alyson added that her contractions were 5 minutes apart and lasting a minute but there wasn’t a rush for me to come yet. Chris was doing counter pressure, and she was managing the pain fine. Her midwife mentioned reaching out so I was aware and would have some time. I asked her to reach out when she gets to the point of needing support and I would head over. Alyson anticipated in an hour would be a good time for me to come but would let me know if things changed before then. It was 5:30 am.

Just 45 minutes later, as I was waking up to head to the hospital, Alyson sent an update that she was in a lot of pain and feeling exhausted. She was thinking she would go ahead and get an epidural. At that point, I told her I should be there if she felt like she needed an epidural and she planned to hold off until I got there. Once I gathered my things and changed, I was on my way. I texted my eta to the hospital of 6:57 am.

The CRNA came into the room to administer the epidural, but Alyson asked her to leave. She was waiting and didn’t really want it. As her contractions continued to roll on through, Alyson moved into positions that would help ease the pain. She found herself on hands and knees on the bed and felt the surprising urge to push. And that’s exactly what was happening! Alyson had gone from 4 cm to pushing a baby out in 1 ½ hours!

Clifton James was born at 6:57 am, which happened to be the same time I texted my ETA. I walked on the unit to the news Alyson had given birth. I could hardly believe it! But sure enough, I walked into a scene of a baby born, but not yet the placenta. Alyson looked exhilarated and Chris was jazzed. They had done it! She clutched her little guy who was crying quite well (thanks to the miracle steroids!). She was given the gift of skin to skin with him right away. He was a strong little guy.

Alyson played over the details and the time frames, and it was mind boggling. Her midwife didn’t even receive a page until 5:00 am so everyone came together in a short time. Alyson was thrilled she gave birth without an epidural and said just knowing I was on my way helped her to hold off on getting it. I was thrilled I was able to help, even if virtually. We helped Alyson get settled and we marveled at her little guy, who weighed in at a surprisingly small 4 lb. 7 oz. He was 17.5 in. long.

Birth is never scripted, and we can’t know how it will unfold even if we think we know. Alyson’s birth was a perfect example of this. I am so proud of how she met the unique challenges thrown her way and kept herself grounded and centered during a very different journey. And ultimately, she did have her unmedicated birth even if for her higher risk labor that required continuous monitoring and elevated concerns for her baby. Alyson rode the tidal waves of her labor with finesse!

Jessica and Nathan welcomed their son, Waylon, on September 25. He is their first son after three daughters! I had the honor of serving as their doula for a previous birth, so it was especially exciting when Jessica reached out to work with me again. Jessica was hopeful for a different experience since her third child was born right at the beginning of COVID when hospitals were trying to figure out safest practices during a pandemic. We were all looking forward to a more “normal” birth experience.

Jessica developed some mild polyhydramnios late in pregnancy and her son was measuring large. While she wasn’t eager for an induction, she was worried about pushing out an 11-pound baby, as she says. She was also wanting to give birth without pain medication as she had when we worked together before, and she knew the longer she waited the larger her fear would grow. And she didn’t want that fear present in her birth.

She reported to her hospital in the evening for cervical ripening in her 39th week. She also had low dose pitocin through the night to help nudge her cervix along. After 12 hours she was dilated 6 cm which was exciting, however, her contractions were still far apart and not too painful yet.

Several hours passed with no update so I checked in. Jessica was still 6 cm dilated, and while her cervix was thin at 80%, her baby was still high at -3 station. Her midwife was able to break her water though and the hope was that her labor would pick up. After an hour had passed, Jessica reported that her contractions were varying between 3-5 minutes apart, but they were more intense, but no longer than 20 seconds or so. Since Jessica was a multip, I felt it was a good time to head in just to be on the safe side.

When I walked in the room at 3:15 pm I could see that Jessica was still comfortable. She breathed through her contractions, but they didn’t require a lot of focus from her. The feel in the room was light with the anticipation of a baby at some point. But the birth did not appear to be imminent. Knowing her water had been broken and the pitocin had been running since the night, it was time for some labor. It was time for some Spinning Babies. We got started 30 minutes after I arrived.

Jessica was game for it all! I explained that we would do the Three Balances in case Waylon’s position was the reason her labor had not yet become active. That was my strong hunch, anyway. And I told her they would each occur during contractions to maximize their effectiveness, and it would be uncomfortable. And she was ready to do it. Nathan handed Jessica her comfort blanket for support. We started with the jiggle through 3 contractions to help loosen her pelvic floor and maybe jiggle enough to make space for her baby to chance his position. The second step was 2 forward leaning inversions which Jessica did like a champ. The third movement was the side-lying release done twice on each side through two contractions. Nathan rubbed Jessica through it to help her relax and feel encouraged (and loved!).

I could hear Jessica moan through contractions during the three maneuvers and was hopeful they would impact her labor. We finished the Three Balances around 4:00 pm or so and Jessica labored through a few contractions on her hands and knees over the CUB in bed. Nathan was a constant presence, stroking her face and her arm, reassuring her and loving her.

The contractions were instantly longer and stronger. I recommended Jessica do lunges over the cub to make more lateral space for baby. She did them without complaint and we could hear in her breath that her labor kicked up another notch. She labored standing beside the bed through a few and the plan became to move her labor to the shower.

I prepared the bathroom with votives and started the water running to let it heat up. Jessica felt like she had to go to the bathroom so the made her way to the toilet, pulling the iv pole beside her. But when she sat down, she felt the urge to push her baby out. It quickly became obvious the shower would not be the next stop. In fact, Jessica needed to make her way back to the bed and the simple act of walking in that moment felt impossible to her. But we walked beside her and one step and a time she got there.

Jessica climbed back up into the bed and rested on her hands and knees. Her nurse checked her and she was “complete and plus two!” It was time to have a baby! The midwife was called, and the nursery nurse was in the room momentarily. We put a cold wet cloth on her back, and she had her comfort blanket nearby.

No sooner did the midwife put on her paper garb and pull the delivery cart to the bed, did Jessica push her baby’s head into view. He moved but the midwife could tell he was a bigger baby than her others. She had Jessica stand in the fire hydrant position (aka a side lunge) and push that way, and her son came barreling out! He coughed and sputtered out fluids and cried out just fine. Waylon was born at 5:06 pm!

He was passed into Jessica’s waiting arms, and I think she was in shock to already have him! Although she had been there nearly 24 hours before meeting him, her active labor was just about an hour long! She clutched her son and tried to let it all sink in as we helped reposition her to sitting in the bed and her midwife waited for the placenta. Nathan cut the cord and was reeling with how fast everything went too.

Jessica’s sister-in-law happened to have left to pick up the girls from school, right as Jessica’s labor began to pick up. And it went so quickly, when she returned with the girls around 5:25, Waylon had already been in the world 20 minutes. The timing was perfect for their pickup and arrival to meet baby brother, although not so perfect for being present at the birth. They were gushing over his cuteness, and I just knew there would be some helpers in those big sisters.

Waylon was indeed Jessica’s heaviest baby weighing 9 lb. 2 oz. He was 21.5 in. long. But Jessica did not let fear affect her labor and pushed out her heaviest baby was all the confidence of her smaller ones. I was so proud of her and how she labored. It was quick and intense, but it was by no means easy. It just goes to show how much baby’s position can impact the way labor unfolds. And I’m very glad what we did worked! (And so is Jessica!)

Jordan and Mike are new parents for the second time! Jordan’s first birth was a very early induction for a medical reason that resulted in her baby in the NICU and some additional challenges with breastfeeding as a result. Jordan wanted a healing birth this time, and she wanted it to be a positive experience. She was not committed to avoiding pain medication but desired to feel strong and capable and like she had choices. Ultimately, she wanted to feel present and hoped for a less dramatic pregnancy and birth this time, and thankfully that’s just what she got!

Jordan was healthy for her entire pregnancy and relished her appointments with the midwives she was also fortunate to work alongside as a labor and delivery nurse. That trust relationship had been built long before the pregnancy and it was very reassuring. Jordan went all the way to her due date with no induction on the books yet. It did have her growing a bit impatient for when and how labor might unfold but she was able to keep herself in check with some reassurance.

And on her due date she sent out an update that she was contracting more painfully than she had been and wondered if things might be percolating. She had some bloody show and fluid which had her alert up as well. But she wasn’t timing anything and wasn’t leaking so she stayed even keel. We talked about how it likely wasn’t labor since it was her actual due date and babies don’t ever choose that day. And we left it at that. (I even went to the beach!)

By that evening the contractions had intensified further and had Jordan reaching out again. She was not timing yet, just trying to ignore them as she continued about her day. Her contractions had her stopping and breathing and focusing though, and she was no longer talking. It was a good time to check the intervals. They were closer than 5 minutes apart and within that hour they were consistently 2-3 minutes apart. They made arrangements for the care of their firstborn, and we were on their way to the hospital. I met them there.

We met up at the hospital around 7:30 pm. And Jordan had minimized and ignored her labor all the way to 5 cm, and nearly 6! She had done brilliantly with spontaneous labor after only experiencing pitocin contractions with her first.  She had a bulging bag and her baby was at -2 station, but once the waters broke we suspected her baby would move right on down.

Jordan got herself situated in a room and Mike and I got busy with labor support. Counter pressure during contractions and a heating pad between them helped. By 8:30 pm the contractions were steady at 2:30 apart and lasting a full minute. They were stronger than when she arrived too.

Just before 9:00 pm was a good time for Jordan to move into the shower. Citrus fresh oil blend on a washcloth in the shower made for a spa feel, along with the battery votives. Jordan labored in there about 30 minutes and when she emerged, she was ready to get an epidural.

She was dilated 8 cm, baby was at 0 station, and her cervix was effaced 90%! Thankfully, the CRNA was fast and effective, and Jordan was comfortable in a short amount of time. At 10:30 she was still dilated 8 cm so we helped her into side-lying positions with the peanut ball to dilate the last bit of cervix. Jordan hoped to get a nap in as well before pushing.

Just before midnight Jordan’s water broke which had us wondering if she’d get much rest. It wasn’t a huge amount of fluid, so she tried to rest after we helped her into the left runner’s position. But thirty minutes later Jordan felt her water break A LOT. So we called in her nurse to confirm and then helped her into the upright throne position at 12:48 am for the last bit of dilation.

Jordan felt the pressure of her contractions so much so that she was blowing through them. So, at 1:38 am we helped her into the flying cowgirl position on her left side. She still had a 9 cm lip of cervix in the front through, so we switched it up and had her go on her hands and knees over the CUB. The nurse on duty had some Spinning Babies knowledge so she got to work doing the jiggle while Jordan was in the hands and knees position. She was completely dilated 10 minutes later at 2:00 am and her baby was at +2 station!

Jordan tried pushing and as we expected it didn’t take long! Her baby was born after just 3 contractions at 2:10 am and Mike and Jordan announced the gender. It was a surprise! And they had another girl! “We have another baby!” Jordan exclaimed. And yes, they did! This baby was much bigger than her sister though! The immediate postpartum was so different and very healing! Jordan had her baby in her arms from the start and she didn’t leave for over an hour. And she latched in the first 20 minutes, another very different journey than her first. The name took some time, but they chose Chloe Mae. (I love the first name especially since my third baby is a Chloe!)

Mike had Jordan’s parents on Facetime for lots of oohs and aahs. This baby didn’t cry right away, just made enough sounds to assure everyone she was just fine. She was content to lay against her mom and gently adjust to being born.

A fun fact about this birth is Chloe was born on her parents’ anniversary! So she dodged her due date but found another significant day. Jordan also had no tears which was extra wonderful given that her first baby was so tiny. Chloe was an overachiever from birth, already trying to catch up to her big sister. She had latched well and nursed on both sides in her first 45 minutes of life.

Jordan had friends in the hospital that came to congratulate her and felt blessed to have been at work when she was in labor. The entire experience was a positive one and very healing for Jordan. She was all smiles, as was Mike, and it was such a joy to accompany them on such a different birth journey.

Chelsea and Chris welcomed baby #3 on August 6. I had been hired by them twice before, so they felt as much like friends as clients to me. Chelsea was forthcoming at our prenatal visit about aspects of her second birth that she would prefer not to repeat. Granted it was during COVID which brought added challenges. Her first two babies also had meconium so that altered some of her postpartum experience with them and involved some separation from one as he received extra attention in the nursery.

While there’s no way to control whether there would be meconium, we were hopeful that this birth would be different since every birth truly is. Chelsea and Chris expected to welcome this baby around Chelsea’s due date since that was the pattern she had established with her first two. With that assumption, plus the hectic homelife raising two young children late in pregnancy, they didn’t do a whole lot of packing ahead of time. And the joke was on them! Because I got a call from Chelsea around 11:00 pm on August 5 telling me her water just broke. And her due date was still two weeks away! There was no meconium though which was a very good start!

Chelsea spoke with the doctor on call, and they decided it was best to mobilize and head to the hospital sooner rather than later. After all, her second labor was just two hours long after her water broke. They were on their way just before midnight with no notable contractions yet. Chris also noticed they only had 18 miles left on the gas tank! Oops! And just 15 minutes later Chelsea texted she had felt 3 contractions that were 6 minutes apart and getting stronger with each one. I gathered my things and was on my way soon after.

I joined them in their triage room and Chelsea was 3 cm dilated. Her 6 minutes apart contractions spaced out after sitting on the triage bed for the NST. I had a suspicion she would need to get put in her proper room before she could let go and labor. It took a while, but by 1:45 am she was shown to her LDR room.

We walked the hallways for 20 minutes and returned to the room where Chelsea did hip swirls on the ball. She expressed that she felt a lot of discomfort in her butt to which Chris said that meant this kid would be a pain in the ass! It got a chuckle. We talked through how fortuitous it was that Chris’ parents happened to be in town for a visit so they could leave the children in their care to go to the hospital.

By 2:35 am the contractions were steady at 4 minutes apart, lasting a minute or longer. Chelsea’s body was moving into active labor and requiring her focus. With Chelsea the signs are subtle. A furrowed brow, closed eyes were signs she was working harder. The contractions were more in the front which was a good sign baby’s position was fine.

And just 20 minutes later, by 2:55 we could hear Chelsea’s breathing as she stepped up her work. She leaned into Chris for support as he rubbed her back and gave a kiss after the contraction. She stood beside the bed and leaned into the CUB through some contractions and then labored on her hands and knees over it by 3:05. Chelsea did lunges and felt her baby moving down a short time later. We heard her breath quiver some as she exhaled at the peaks of the contractions, another subtle sign to us that Chelsea was progressing. Nausea hit her so she moved out of the bed to labor standing.

Judging from her efforts, it felt like a good time to recommend laboring in the shower. Chelsea considered renting a tub but since her second labor was so quick, she thought she’d skip it. This was right around when she told us she wished she had the tub. I reminded her that the shower was another good option for hydrotherapy. So she gave it a try. With votives and citrus fresh and lemon essential oil blends on a washcloth, the shower became a labor sanctuary that woke up her senses and maybe even helped her feel a little less tired.

The contractions were 2 minutes apart now, and Chelsea felt her baby ‘right in her butt,’ point with her hand to show us where. Her nurse began setting up the delivery table and Chelsea made her way out of the shower. We switched out cold cloths on her neck and Chris and I rubbed her back lightly. Chris kissed Chelsea on her shoulders as she labored their baby earthside.

At 4:18 am her doctor appeared and recommended a cervical exam. Chelsea was game for it and we learned she was dilated a surprising 6 cm, 80% effaced, with baby at -1. To be honest, we thought she would have been farther along. But the trajectory of labor cannot be contained in Friedman’s Curve, although so many try. Chelsea wandered to the bathroom and returned sounding different. It was 4:26 am and she dropped the f-bomb. She moaned with her contractions and requested no more counter pressure.

She lay upon her side in the bed at 4:40 am and told us she was feeling pushy with each contraction. Her doctor wanted to confirm whether it was “time” to push about 10 minutes later, but since Chelsea’s cervix was 7 cm, it was best to wait. Her baby was at 0 station, and she was effaced to 905, but Chelsea continued to feel a lot of pressure. She lingered on her side for another contraction or two and then returned to her hands and knees at 4:56. “I feel my energy coming back,” and so she resumed an upright position to get it done. Chris later said he knew his wife meant business once she said that. And he was not wrong.

I mentioned that doing lunges might help her baby’s head melt her cervix away and make the urge to push grow even more. She did not hesitate and did a lunge right then and there. It was 5:01 and she felt pushier. She did a lunge on the right with the next contraction and felt an even stronger pushing urge.

Her doctor had been lingering in the room since the previous exam, knowing Chelsea was progressing rapidly. The pushing sounds had her pulling the cart to the end of the bed and then dressing into her paper suit. Then the craziest thing happened, as Chelsea followed her body’s lead she pushed, and we heard a small gurgle. The sheet was covering Chelsea’s back side, so I lifted it up and saw her baby’s face! It was the only full-on pushing contraction and with the next push her baby was out! Their baby arrived at 5:08 am and Chelsea made the announcement that it was another boy! Chris was crying and expressing such love through his tears. Chelsea had gone from 7 cm to baby in 15 minutes.

We helped her get back down to her back upon the bed and the placenta was out in a few minutes, all while Chelsea had William Joseph in her arms from the beginning and for the entirety of that first hour. The placenta was born, and her doctor said those words that make every newly postpartum mom sing: no tears!

Chelsea drank some coconut water and ate some peanut butter for her first postpartum snack but there would soon be much better options in store. After that first hour, William had his first exam. He weighed 6 lb. 14 oz. and was 20 in. long. But he was back in his mother’s arms in no time.

Chelsea and Chris admit that this was the least prepared they had ever been for a birth. But it just goes to show they really didn’t need much. The birth was beautiful, and their children embraced their new brother without reservation. Eleanor is now a big sister twice over as a kindergartener, and Daniel quickly grew out of baby status at 21 months, to welcome his baby brother, in his words, “Baby Wheel.”

It was a joy to accompany this family in their surprisingly early birth. It tied so much together for them and for me as well. It doesn’t matter the dilation, and babies are going to come when they are ready. And this particular baby had something to say from the start!

Zoe and Michael welcomed their fourth and final baby on August 2! But just because this was their fourth time in birth didn’t’ mean it would go the way they expected. (or any of us, for that matter) They took my class to prepare for the birth of their second baby. And then hired me as their doula for their third baby, whose birth I made by minutes. Zoe’s active labor was just one hour! Knowing how fast Zoe’s third labor went had us wondering how this birth would unfold and whether I would have enough time to make it. I know it had Zoe a little on edge as well since she had three kiddos to arrange before leaving for the hospital.

The laboring pictures were actually taken July 25, the first time Zoe came to the hospital thinking it was labor.

Zoe’s body had regular bouts of rhythmic contractions that had her wondering if it was “it”. She reached out from time to time, but the contractions petered out. That is until July 25. Her contractions were 5 minutes apart since 6:30 am and moved to 4 minutes apart by 8:30. By 9:15 am she could no longer breathe through them and was thinking of leaving for the hospital soon. Her midwife agreed that she should head in and we met up around 10:20 am.

Zoe was dilated 3 cm and could easily stretch to 4 cm, but after walking around and breathing through strong contractions she was still 4 cm 2 hours later. She tried to use a breast pump to get her contractions to intensify and hopefully move her into active labor, but another exam that evening around 5:00 had her cervix the same. She was not in labor and much as she had hoped to welcome her baby that day, her midwife reminded her that going home would keep her from the possibility of needing pitocin if breaking her water didn’t work. Zoe agreed and returned home.

About a week later, at her prenatal appointment with a different midwife, the possibility of induction was brought up. Zoe was barely past 40 weeks, but the logistical details were stressful coupled with her propensity for rapid active labor. So she agreed to move forward with an induction the following day, August 2.

Zoe reported to the hospital that day and the induction process was very slow to start. It was a busy day at the hospital too, and Zoe was content to be patient knowing she was finally going to meet her baby and not go home. She was also aware that I was with another client in labor, but her midwife and I were hopeful she would birth midday. (Of course, we were wrong!)

Zoe tried a breast pump that morning around 7:00 to see if it might rustle up some serious contractions. But the contractions fizzled, and her midwife confirmed at 9:00 am that she was the same as she was: 4 cm/80%. Pitocin was the next step and began sometime after 10:00 am. It was raised little by little until at 2:00 it was at 10 mu. An exam had Zoe at the same dilation, but her baby had moved lower in the pelvis. Her midwife suspected with a little bit more pitocin she would be back in a few hours to break her water. Zoe was fine with that plan.

By 3:00 pm Zoe’s contractions were coming close, but she could talk through them. I asked her if she needed support, but she said she could wait. About 30 minutes later Zoe was dilated 6 cm. Her nurse felt it was a good time to break her water and was going to get the midwife to do so, but Zoe preferred to wait. At that point I told her to please keep me posted because it was looking like I would need to call a backup doula in for her. And Zoe said she would.

Zoe took a lap walking with the iv pole and pitocin pump and about 45 minutes later her contractions went erratic and it was time. She texted that they were going to break her water, so it was a good time to have the backup doula come. I sent out the text and Brandy Burd was on her way.

With the backup doula enroute and Zoe ready to have her water broken, it turns out her midwife and the OB were both busy and unable to break Zoe’s water just yet. But her contractions intensified all the same and she was soon feeling her body move through active labor and transition in a short amount of time.

Shortly after Brandy arrived, it was clear that birth was imminent. Zoe had moved headlong into her brief active labor and after less than an hour was feeling a lot of pressure. She was laboring on her hands and knees and feeling pushy, and her nurse looked down and saw a balloon (the bag of water) coming out. The midwife was called but it was looking like a nurse delivery! The water broke at 5:42 pm, then a head came, and the midwife arrived, quickly gloved up and caught the baby at 5:43 pm!

Lots of people came running in since the birth happened in a crazy way, but mom and baby were just fine and mostly relieved to finally meet each other! Michael was also relieved to know there was support and he wouldn’t have to catch the baby himself. Skyler May weighed 8 lb. 14 oz. and was 20.25 in. long. She is adorable and her chunks only add to the cuteness.

Zoe’s birth was unexpected in some ways, but predictable in others. I hope she learned how capable she is and how little control anyone has over birth. Even with an induction it took all day, something we didn’t expect! We had already been together for 8 hours the week prior expecting a birth and were so wrong!

Zoe’s birth also highlights the value of support. Zoe was invested in having me there to serve her but there came a point when it was not going to happen, and she needed the doula Skyler chose to be there! I don’t call backup often, but this day I had to call in 2 backup doulas for the first time ever! The babies were born in the very same hour too! I am grateful for the doulas I trust to serve my clients when I am not available. And I am grateful for the clients who choose to hire me even though they have a history of precipitous labors. As Zoe’s birth highlights, you just never know. Every birth is different. Even in the same woman.

Photo Credit: Sarah Fitz Photo

Photo credit: Sarah Fitz Photo

Photo Credit: Sarah Fitz Photo

Rachel and Lucas welcomed their third child, this time a BOY, on June 23! Rachel was familiar with the road of induction since she had been induced for her first two births due to high blood pressure. She hoped to avoid it but knew that it was a possibility again. She also had experienced a postpartum hemorrhage and hoped to avoid that this time. But Rachel trusted her providers and knew with good support and some strategies in place she would have every opportunity to welcome a third baby in an unmedicated birth.

Like third babies do, Rachel’s uterus was very busy preparing in the final weeks, producing bouts of contractions and general discomfort. She’s also a busy mom so it’s not easy to sit much and rest like one might do with a first pregnancy! Her body set the stage for labor in the last weeks though, and she was dilated 3-4 cm at her last prenatal appointment.

With an induction on the calendar, Rachel tried to do “all of the things” to jump start labor beforehand, but none of it worked, although it might have helped lay some groundwork. The day of the induction there were no beds at the first call—a hurry up and wait experience that is typical of inductions--but a few hours later there was a call that a bed was ready, so Rachel and Lucas made their way in.

Rachel was dilated 4-5 cm with regular (but far apart) contractions at 9 minutes. Her midwife did a membrane sweep in the hopes it might move her into active labor along with the breast pump. The contractions got stronger and closer but remained irregular. A few hours later around noon Rachel was dilated 5 cm, but her labor wasn’t really coordinated yet. The plan was to break her water closer to 1:00 and hope that worked. Pitocin at a low dose was another option but Rachel hoped to avoid pitocin and go the most natural way with induction.

Rachel stayed quite active as she waited, even doing full low squats. She continued to chat pleasantly with us, hardly acting as though she was in labor. And when her midwife returned at 1:00 she broke her water. Rachel was still 5 cm, same as an hour before, but we expected her body would take off with active labor and big changes soon.

Rachel squatted and leaned over the Cub birthing chair and kept moving around to see if her body would get going with active labor. She even did lunges over the Cub on the bed in case her baby’s head might interface more directly with the cervix to dilate it and bring on stronger contractions. She was willing to do anything suggested and even some things she thought of on her own. She listened to her body and was not afraid to move it.

Rachel shared with us that her contractions were definitely stronger soon after her water was broken, but by all accounts, she was managing them well. It seemed a good time to have her try the shower so we dimmed the lights, added votives so she could focus on her body’s signals. Rachel stood on the shower, sat on the bench seat, and even lunged with her foot upon it. Her chatting lessened as she was drawn more inside herself for the last bit of labor. She might not have known it at the time, but the 20 minutes Rachel spent in the shower when she thought it felt “so good”, was when she went through transition!

In fact, Rachel had the wherewithal to tell Lucas and I towards the end of the 20 minutes, “It’s not long now. We’ll want to notify the midwife soon.” That’s when we let the nurse know and helped her out of the shower and back toward the bed after a quick potty stop. Her midwife arrived a few minutes later at 2:42 pm and confirmed at 2:47 that “baby is right here.” In fact, as Rachel recalls, her midwife said, “You’re a 10!” And Rachel responded with, “That means I can push?” She felt him descending as she breathed through two contractions. And then her midwife gently suggested Rachel push.

“Babe, I need chapstick,” was Rachel’s response before her first push. Lucas had it there in a flash. Rachel pushed through one contraction. Then Lucas applied chapstick to her lips, and with the next contraction Rachel reached her hand down to help ease her baby out as she growled her push. Rachel received her baby from her midwife’s hands, meeting Eli Melech Charles at 2:55 pm.

Eli tried to cry when he was halfway out! And once his body was born, he cried out in a high-pitched squeal. Rachel got a good look at her boy and noticed in a short time that he had the same toes as his sister. I love how parents see family resemblances in their newborn babies.

Rachel did not tear and as a result her midwife was finished soon after the placenta was out. There was plenty of time for a big hug! It was such a beautiful birth and a very gentle induction. And when I saw Rachel recently for our postpartum visit, she was still riding the high of the birth. She said it was perfect and everything she would have wanted. And as her doula, I can say the same about her as a client!

Christina and Sam welcomed their second daughter, Tatum Ellis, on June 11! After giving birth to her first daughter, Stevie, Christina had a good idea of her goals in this birth as well as postpartum. Having journeyed through a challenging first experience, Christina knew to remain open-minded and to use what worked last time. And I really think this freed her up to have a very positive birth experience.

Her body made some gradual changes as her due date approached. An exam around 38 weeks showed she was already 2 cm dilated. This was exciting news since she received the call that same day that the induction was scheduled for the weekend. But when Christina called at the appointed time, they told her there were no beds available. She waited through the night and finally the following morning she got the call to come in. Inductions can be a lot of hurry up and wait!

Around 11:30 am Sam sent an update that the foley bulb had been placed but just an hour later it came out  and Christina was 3 cm dilated. Christina wanted to delay (or even avoid) pitocin so she used a breast pump first for a bit. She also tried to rest as long as she could as she waited for labor. Eventually they began Pitocin at 3:00 pm and raised it slowly in the hopes her body would respond with labor contractions.

By 5:00 she was contracting every 3 minutes but still able to talk through them. But since this was her second baby it seemed a good time to head in. I arrived to find Christina  coping well and Sam a steadfast support to her. There was an exam soon after I arrived at 6:45 pm. Christina was about the same: 3 cm, 50% effaced, and her baby as at -3 station. It was time to use some techniques to help bring baby down. So I used the rebozo to “shake the apple tree” and did the jiggle from Spinning Babies to help get her baby situated.

Just past shift change at 7:15 pm we helped Christina into the flying cowgirl with the peanut ball. She took all of the maneuvers and positions in stride knowing they were all to help bring Tatum earthside. A cherry popsicle was a godsend and so was my jumbo heating pad as her hips ached from labor.

Christina lay on her right side for some contractions and then moved to her hands and knees at 8:30. After a bathroom trip she wanted to sit upright  in the bed to use gravity to brig her baby down. She preferred that position since it helped her feel like she could better cope with her contractions. It also gave Sam a good opportunity to rub her feet.

Christina was feeling her labor take a turn and was curious about her progress. But at 9:30 pm she was dilated 3-4 cm, and not farther like she had hoped. Her cervix was softer but it had a good deal of effacement left before big dilation could happen.  Christina decided to get  an epidural at that point since her labor was taking longer to get established than she expected and the night loomed long.

She was comfortable by 11:00 pm and did her best to sleep. Pitocin was still flowing at 8 mu and at 1:00 am an exam confirmed she was  dilated 4 cm, 70% effaced, and her baby was still high at -3. They broke her water at that point since Christina was on board with it. And we all hoped it would put her into active labor.

We used the peanut ball to keep her hips asymmetric and kept her body rotating from side to side as well. Sam got some sleep and Christina tried, but it can be hard to rest when you are meeting your baby soon. Plus busy hospitals aren’t very conducive to sleep. We sat Christina up in the bed in the throne position again and she was soon feeling nauseous and shaking. We were excited because this was an encouraging sign of progress! Even with an epidural, the body knows. They set up the delivery table taking this as a strong sign baby was coming soon!

Just before 5:00 am Christina had a lip on the right side but she was 100% effaced and her baby had moved down to 0 station! Christina labored down another 1 ½ hours so that lip could melt away and her baby could descend even further. She spent a lot of time on her right side along with a heating pad on her back and hip and peppermint close by for nausea.

And feeling lots of pressure at 6:25 am, the doctor checked to discover Christina’s baby was “right there”! She began pushing at 6:32 and her baby girl arrived at 6:36, after just one or two contractions! Tatum Ellis was welcomed with such love and joy! Christina scooped her up and in that moment the long induction journey was already the last thing on her mind. It was all worth it to have her second baby girl in her arms.

And even though her baby came in just a couple of pushes there were no stitches needed! Kudos to Christina for having control as she pushed and the benefit of warm compresses and oil from the doctor. Tatum weighed in at 7 lb. 3 oz.

Tatum was a very chill baby who hardly cried. But her nursery nurse was content with hearing breath sounds and seeing her pink up before her eyes. She snuggled with her mom right away and before long Christina was presented with a pancakes, sausage, and egg breakfast!

This couple was a joy to serve. They partnered beautifully and kept a sense of humor through the entire process. Christina knew an induction wouldn’t be an easier way, but she was prepared and knew her options every step of the journey. She had agency and was respected and supported. And that makes for a strong start to motherhood.

Regina got used to nightly contractions. As she lay down to bed, her uterus went to work getting ready. The texts to me were frequent, and so much so that I reminded Regina that it was best to ignore and minimize the late pregnancy/pre-labor contractions unless or until they were consistently getting longer and stronger at 5 minutes apart or closer.

A week went by and then a text: I’m in labor. 5 cm. It was a startling text but Regina was in triage and calmly waiting until she was moved to her proper labor and delivery room. She assured me she was still comfortable, and it was not an emergency. But I knew with her history that her cervix could open right up at any time, so I got there within the hour.

When I arrived, she caught me up on the timetable. She woke at 7:00 am to contractions that were strong but spaced. She spoke with the midwife, made arrangements for the care of her girls, and then proceeded to the hospital. The midwife tried to break her water at 11:35 am to keep momentum going but it was not confirmed whether she was successful. So, I encouraged Regina to try various positions as she waited for her labor to move into active. She rested over the CUB on the bed, and I applied a heating pad to her back. She updated friends and family by phone since her contractions were not yet requiring all her focus.

Her midwife returned and hinted that her baby might be OP so we were more strategic with positioning. Regina found lavender relaxing, so she leaned in to smell the lavender doused cotton ball taped to her wrist. She labored in the throne position and placed one foot on the squat bar and then the other. And by 2:00 pm her contractions had moved closer at a steady 3 minutes apart.

Regina felt a lot of pressure during one bathroom trip so I recommended she might give the shower a try. With dim lights (votives) and the lavender on a washcloth, Regina spent time in the shower and soon felt like her contractions weren’t as close. (They were.)

At 2:45 pm another midwife came in to do a check since Regina’s midwife was otherwise engaged, and announced she was dilated 8 cm, 90% effaced, and her baby was at 0 station. These were big numbers! Regina felt a lot of pressure and told us so. “Is it too late for the epidural?” she asked. And while it technically wasn’t, it likely would have been too much trouble for too little relief. We stepped up the support and helped Regina move into different positions to help her progress and pain management.

Her midwife joined us right before 3:00 pm and Regina insisted, “She’s coming! I can’t hold it.” She moved to her hands and knees at 3:20 but did not like it, so she rolled to her side. It was not comfortable either, but then again at that point in labor not much is. Regina breathed through the last contractions before second stage and at 3:47 pm her midwife checked and confirmed, “Your baby is right here at +2.”

“I need a break,” Regina stammered. It was 4:00 and she had been working much of the day on this baby. We validated her hard work and assured her she would have a break very soon. I reminded her to push right into the pain and not to back away from it. Regina continued, but she struggled with pushing into the pain.

There was a forebag remaining, so her midwife broke it after Regina consented. We were hopeful her baby would come right on down and out, but she didn’t. Regina pull pushed with the rebozo, and thirty minutes later she pushed in the traditional way. But her baby wasn’t coming. Regina had hit a major wall and she didn’t feel she could persist. She was tired and over it all. The doctor came in and discussed options including assisting with the delivery, and a c-section was even brought up as a last resort. “That! I want that.” Regina insisted that was what she wanted to do, and we were all confused and shocked. She was adamant! What do you do? 

Meeting big sister!

It was a relief to everyone but most of all to Regina to have her baby safely in her arms. Regina birthed her without a tear and had her daughter on the breast with little effort. Eliana weighed 6 lb. and was 19.5 in. long. Ultimately, Regina had to get to the point of being ready to have her baby. There was the final bit of work to be done and in the moment it felt impossible. But then she did it. Regina is a woman who gets things done! And I was so proud of her that day. She is back into her busy life now and we are trying to get her postpartum visit scheduled nearly a month out. (She’s that busy!) But I am confident she is adjusting to being a single mom of three surprisingly well. I also know that she has a village of support which makes a big difference. It was an honor to witness her strength in birth.

Summer and David welcomed their second baby, this time a boy, on March 29. Summer’s first baby was very content to remain in the breech position. It didn’t matter what her mama did, she was resolute in staying head up. Summer went through all the emotions that come when a birth doesn’t go as you envisioned, and she met her baby girl in a scheduled c-section.

This time she was once again committed to giving birth vaginally if possible. She chose the same providers knowing their reputation for supporting VBACS (vaginal birth after cesarean). And time ticked on in her pregnancy much more rapidly than it had the first time. (Babies make time go faster!) Summer and David’s first child was still a baby herself and would be 16 months at the time of her brother’s birth. She was toddling and very busy, and Summer found herself busy and, on her feet, chasing her firstborn.

This baby was head down at least. Thank goodness! But this child posed a different set of challenges. He was so content inside that he wasn’t showing any signs of budging. An induction became the likely plan, but only if Summer’s body was showing signs of readiness. Her providers wanted to be sure they could encourage a gentle induction and with her recent c-section they were limited in the cervical ripeners that would be safe for her.

As Summer’s due date came and went, it was clear that her only option for a vaginal birth was an induction. But sadly, her cervix wasn’t showing any signs of getting ready. Closed, thick, and high. These were the words she heard from one appointment to the next. A final NST and ultrasound made it official. Her baby was measuring 8 lb. 13oz. and had his hand by his head. Her providers were not comfortable with an induction. So, they recommended a repeat c-section. (Spoiler alert: remember that ultrasound weight…)

Look at those rolls!

Summer mourned the change in her birth once again. She took the time she needed to process it and then gathered herself in preparation for what was to come. Her recovery would be different simply because she had a toddler roaming about. The need for rest would be even more important this time. The c-section was scheduled for 1:30 pm on March 29, but was soon changed to the first scheduled c-section of the day. Summer surmised it was probably her compassionate OB’s doing, knowing it would give her less time to stress over it.

Along those lines, Summer advocated for what she needed. And that included how I could best serve as her doula. She requested I come after the birth and provide support then as she processed everything. The c-section went well. Music played, courtesy of DJ David. Notable songs were Mama Mia by Abba and Wanna Be by Spice Girls. The music helped with Summer’s anxiety, and so did her deep breaths. At one point she breathed so deeply she lowered her heart rate into the 40s! Sage David was born at 8:21 am, but he needed more respiratory support than expected. Summer got a glimpse of him right after he was born, but soon it was a quick kiss and then he was off to the nursery. That was disheartening as it meant he wouldn’t be with Summer for skin to skin at first. David went with him to the nursery and Summer requested I come at that point.

And one more thing about Sage. He was a big boy! He weighed 11 pounds! Ultrasounds can be off by 20% when used to gauge baby’s size in the final weeks, but this ultrasound was off by 25% in the wrong direction! Suffice it to say, Summer welcomed the big number with relief as it helped her feel even more justified in the repeat c-section. I have seen several 11-pound babies born vaginally unmedicated, but Summer was content to sidestep that experience. And I was happy she got validation for the c-section through that detail of his weight! An 11-pound baby definitely wouldn’t have made labor any easier.

I was by Summer’s side soon after she called. I helped her process things but also aided in her advocacy regarding getting information about Sage and when she could go and see him. She was recovering from the c-section well and was on her way to visit him by wheelchair before I left. And he was back with her later that night.

All in all, this birth experience was less traumatic than the first one. Summer told me there were some bonuses too. She didn’t get extremely nauseous like last time since the anesthesiologist was able to adjust her meds this time to prevent that. Plus her OB was able to give her a scar revision, which she appreciated. And to top it off, her doctor did come see her later that Sage was very high in her pelvis and the VBAC may not have happened even if she had tried. This was just another validation! Summer felt the c-section was the best decision, especially in light (or heavy?) of her son’s weight. I just love when birth can be healing. And this one was.