The Birth of Phoebe Lamar 9/8/20

Phoebe Lamar arrived in a way unlike any of her mother’s previous births. So many things were different—she was born during a pandemic, she was born at home, and she was a SHE! Although this was my third time to accompany Elizabeth and Tyler in birth, it by no means was a repeat of the other births. Every single birth journey is unique as every single baby is unique. Elizabeth was pregnant before COVID-19 took hold of the world. She had considered a homebirth previously, but once the pandemic had made its mark on the labor and delivery units of local hospitals, Elizabeth knew it was time to take her birth home. She knew who she wanted to have present and she knew they unfortunately, would not all be permitted if she gave birth in the hospital. She chose her homebirth midwife and was all set.

However, her pregnancy did not go without hiccups. She failed her glucose tolerance test and was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. Her midwife was not overly concerned and in time the erroneous readings were traced to a faulty glucometer. From that point on, Elizabeth’s sugars were great, as was her diet. She continued on with her pregnancy, going past her due date by over a week, which did not surprise us in the least since this had been her experience previously.

With the days closing in on an impending hospital transfer and induction, Elizabeth tried some natural methods to tip her uterus into labor. And the regimen recommended by her midwife did the trick because by 9:30 that night, Elizabeth and Tyler had retreated to their bedroom upstairs, out of sight and earshot of their other children who were in grandma’s care. Things ramped up rather quickly, and just before midnight the entire birth team was assembled in their home in the country. (Elizabeth was very thankful there was no active labor car ride necessary this time around.) They had drifted into a comfortable rhythm with each contraction. Elizabeth would cease her chatter and Tyler would step in closer to apply counter pressure to her back. Elizabeth was as expressive as usual between her contractions, but we were not fooled. She was being drawn in deeper before our eyes.

An hour later, with contractions coming every 2 ½ minutes, Elizabeth let the reality set in that “It’s going to be hard and I’m not excited about it.” Recognizing even the most subtle of signs, the midwives began to fill the tub. Sweat beaded on Elizabeth’s forehead and we applied a wet cold cloth. Her exhales morphed into “ohs” and her words between came slower and fewer. It became more difficult to remain even keeled and Elizabeth knew she wanted in the tub. Even though it wasn’t quite full, her midwives support her desire to get in, knowing that her intuition was the best guide. Elizabeth entered the tub at 3:35 am. Elizabeth leaned back against the tub wall, then she leaned forward and rocked on her hands and knees. We maintained our steady support as she drifted deeper. Her water broke at 4:07 am, we knew because Elizabeth told us so. And she was almost immediately overcome with a pushing contraction. I pushed against Elizabeth’s back as she felt the most intense pressure of all as her baby came through. And she soon gasped, “She’s coming! I can feel her,” as if to let us know so we could take our places, even though we were already there. And the head moved slowly out into the midwife’s hand, and another push brought Phoebe into the world at 4:18 am on September 8.

Elizabeth received her baby girl from under her leg and into her arms in true waterbirth style. “We have a girl!” she exclaimed looking up at Tyler, as if saying it made it real and true. This was the first girl after all boys, after all. So seeing (and feeling) is believing! The placenta was born just past 4:30 and there was no hurry to separate Phoebe from it, not from her mother. She rested in her arms and had her first meal of colostrum before any thought of anything else. Eventually Phoebe was weighed and examined. She came in at 8 lb. 4.8 oz. and measured 21 in. long, right as the sun was started to rise outside. Her brothers would be up soon along with the chickens and turkeys. We soon cleaned up and took our leave so the family could settle in with their newest addition, right as grandma was waking up. It was a beautiful birth and except for the masks on our faces, didn’t let on to the craziness of a pandemic that had overtaken our world. We felt the beauty that night. And the normalcy. And the love. Thank you for that. 

**All images courtesy of Amanda with Kimberlin Gray Photography: kimberlingrayphotography.com