When I first met Blair, she expressed to me the importance of feeling safe and calm in her labor. Her first birth left her feeling frantic and overwhelmed after arriving to the hospital late in dilation. Blair didn’t feel as if she had a voice, and she really wanted more agency and control this time. She also hoped that in her second birth she would have the opportunity to feel her way through labor and get to her birthplace with enough time to do so. She did her research from selecting a doula to even taking childbirth classes to give her a deeper level of preparation to welcome her second child.

I was surprised when she texted around 8:00 am on March 21 that her water had broken since that’s not how labor usually begins. It had me wondering if things might take off like a shot for her but was surprised and humbled when they didn’t. Blair decided to go in to see her midwife and get checked for some peace of mind, and she was reassured that her water had broken, and she was dilated to 5 cm. Since the contractions were on the mild side, they chose to return home and wait for labor to pick up. It turned out to be a lovely afternoon spent as their last hours as a family of three.

A couple of hours later, Blair’s contractions had intensified. She did some walking and continued to breathe and move in ways that felt more comfortable. She would update with changes but after a few more hours passed with no word, I thought to text. The timing was just right as Blair was just about to send an update. She had a very big contraction and a gush of liquid, which left her feeling a lot of pressure. Once her mom got to the house they would be leaving for the hospital. We planned to meet there.

I arrived behind them just past 5:00 that evening. Blair was on the bed with the monitor around her belly for the required 20-minute NST. It was a temporary inconvenience, and she would soon be free to labor unattached. She was dilated 6 cm but was more importantly 100% effaced. Her baby boy was at -1 station. Blair labored over the CUB birthing chair once the monitors were removed, and she had a particularly strong contraction at 5:40 pm that left her shaky and nauseous. Peppermint essential helped with the nausea, but Blair’s contractions were very quickly relentless, coming back-to-back, leaving little chance to catch her breath. We placed a cold washcloth on her neck, seeing that her cheeks had grown flush. And John lovingly encouraged Blair, telling her she was so strong and that he was proud of her. He gently placed his hand upon her back, demonstrating in a simple way that he was right there.

We readied the shower for her, but just getting off the bed caused a contraction that had Blair lean into John for support. We walked with her to the bathroom, pausing for a contraction or two along the way. Blair was vocalizing with each contraction after laboring quietly, so we knew she had turned a corner. Blair was in the shower at 6:15 pm but after a contraction on her knees, she made her way back out. The pressure she felt was very close to pushing and she knew her baby was close.

Blair returned to the bed and was dilated 9.5 cm with an anterior lip. She labored through those last few dilating contractions on her side upon the bed, holding onto to John who never took his gaze off her. He reminded her of her strength, we all did. And we encouraged her to follow her body and push when it felt right.

As she lay on her side, her body moved her into second stage, and she pushed her baby down into view rather quickly. And it didn’t take long before he was in the world. Benjamin Miles was born at 6:49 pm! When Blair birthed her son, he was placed into her arms and her response was so pure and sweet. She was baffled and shocked, and immediately overcome with the outpouring of tears of love saying, “Our son!” and “I love having him here!” John met her exclamations with a smile and a kiss, and so much love. We watched them take in their son, touching him and talking to him. And it was such a sweet welcome.

Blair confessed that she didn’t think she could do it, and of course we all knew she could, and she did. And John took his son’s hand in his, as he stroked Blair’s hair as she continued to tearfully process what she had done.

When the cord had slowed its pulse about 6 minutes later, John cut it and as Blair held her son’s hand, he placed his first had upon his head. He leaned in and looked at his son’s face and they continued to let their experience sink in. And when he was ready, Benjamin latched for his first feed and even got some skin to skin with daddy too, all in his first hour of life.

Benjamin looked rather big against Blair’s small frame, so we were all very curious to learn his weight. And he did not disappoint at 9 lb. 2 oz.! Benjamin weighed nearly 1 ½ pounds more than his sister did at birth! And you would never even know it until he came out. Blair labored him into the world with strength, control, and patience.

Looking at how it unfolded, I think Blair would say she got her wish. Labor was gradual in its onset, giving her the time and space to get her head ready and to spend time with her sweet family. And when the time was right, she proceeded to the hospital where her midwife was waiting for her. She labored just under two hours at the hospital before meeting her son, and for a second baby, that’s good, considering her active labor wasn’t much longer than that! I will always remember the love that was threaded through this birth, between Blair and John, with their firstborn earlier that day, and ultimately with the tearful elation with which they greeted their son. It was so beautiful.

The Birth of Benjamin Miles 3/21/22